The Happiness Lab: Getting Unstuck

Why Chasing Success Can Leave You Feeling Stuck (with David Brooks)

39 snips
Jan 19, 2026
In this captivating discussion, David Brooks, a renowned author and New York Times columnist, dives into the contrast between resume virtues and eulogy virtues. He challenges the obsession with quantifying success, emphasizing the importance of kindness and character development through daily habits. Brooks advocates for embracing discomfort to foster personal growth and the value of local service in strengthening communities. He also explores how making others feel seen is vital for connection, revealing practical steps to reconnect with our passions and get unstuck.
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INSIGHT

Resume Versus Eulogy Virtues

  • David Brooks distinguishes 'resume' virtues (job skills) from 'eulogy' virtues (character like honesty and courage).
  • He argues society overvalues measurable resume virtues while losing sight of deeper character qualities.
INSIGHT

Beware Quantifying People

  • Brooks warns that quantifying people misleads us because the most important traits resist measurement.
  • He says so-called 'soft' skills are actually the hardest and most consequential for life success.
ADVICE

Use Exemplars To Shape Character

  • Read biographies and surround yourself with exemplars to unconsciously absorb better habits and values.
  • Use visible reminders (postcards, portraits) of admired people to nudge moral behavior daily.
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