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If you are a Highly Sensitive Person or tend towards anxiety/depression, it is likely you are the more difficult partner. You may try to seem laid back or blame your demandingness on external variables, but this only serves to gaslight your partner. If you are the one who chooses most activities and has the more specific needs for routines and timing for everything from meals to sex, then you are likely the more difficult partner. If you own this, and appreciate your partner for deferring to you, you can have a much closer and more authentic relationship. Furthermore, you can model "owning" your issues for your kids!
Related links:
When You're The More "Difficult" Partner
Own Your Issues And Your Kids Will Learn To Own Theirs
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The Dr. Psych Mom Show
with clinical psychologist
Dr. Samantha Rodman Whiten