
Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship
#142 - Friendship, Phones, and The Problem of Distraction: Katherine Martinko
What happens to our friendships when our phones are always within reach for us to "quickly check something" or "quickly answer a text?" It’s time to be honest about how available we are to everyone else while spending time with friends and how these distractions are harming our friendships. (I include myself in "we!") Is anyone else experiencing smart phone fatigue?
I spoke with author, Katherine Martinko, whose book Childhood Unplugged and Substack newsletter, The Analog Family, focuses on how to take back our presence, one small shift at a time. This episode isn’t an anti-tech rant—it’s a nuanced conversation about building a life and fostering friendships offline with intentionality. We explore what’s lost when we let phones dominate our social time and what’s gained when we reclaim our attention and presence. All issues I need as much help with as anyone else!
TOPICS WE COVERED:
- Screen time isn't just a kid issue—it's an adult problem, too
- Why undivided attention is one of the most generous gifts in friendship
- Building a richer, more soul-nourishing life offline is the key to putting your phone down more often.
- Practical tips for reducing phone use during social gatherings
- Small changes that make a huge difference
- Why 7 minutes into a conversation might be the tipping point for going deeper (if you don’t pick up your phone!)
- What it really takes to “fix your analog life first”
LINKS & RESOURCES:
- One of my favorite essays by Katherine: “Fix Your Analog Life First: It's a Prerequisite for Curbing Screen Time”
- Jonathan Haidt’s The Anxious Generation
- Cal Newport’s work on digital minimalism and deep work
- Sherry Turkle’s Alone Together
- Erin Loechner’s The Opt-Out Family
MEET KATHERINE MARTINKO: Katherine is a writer, editor, and speaker. She is the author of Childhood Unplugged: Practical Advice to Get Kids Off Screens and Find Balance (2023) and creator of a fast-growing Substack newsletter called The Analog Family. Katherine is a speaker on behalf of Jonathan Haidt's Anxious Generation campaign. She is a regular contributor to the Globe and Mail, Canada’s largest newspaper, and appears regularly on national radio, TV, talk shows, and podcasts, including CBC The National and Global TV. Katherine lives with her family in Ontario, Canada. See her website here.
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