Letting Go of the “This Year Will Be Different” Story
Feb 5, 2026
They unpack why the “this year will be different” cycle collapses for ADHD brains and how early dopamine and unrealistic maintenance expectations fuel the crash. They use a sock drawer story to show startup hype versus long-term upkeep. They explore why asking for help feels risky and offer ways to reframe help as advocacy, build margin, and focus on today instead of future promises.
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New Motivation Is Not Lasting Change
New motivation gives a short dopamine spike that doesn't guarantee long-term change for ADHD brains.
Maintenance expectations often don't match ADHD realities, so setups collapse and cause guilt.
question_answer ANECDOTE
The Sock Drawer Example
Nikki describes organizing a sock drawer beautifully and watching it revert to chaos in weeks.
The sock drawer example illustrates how short-term wins often don't survive unrealistic maintenance demands.
insights INSIGHT
The Gap Trap: Focus On Today
The real trap is living between who you were yesterday and who you hope to be tomorrow — the 'gap trap.'
You only have leverage over today, so focus on present actions free of judgment to move forward.
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That “this year will be different” promise feels so good when it’s fresh… and so brutal when the old patterns quietly return. In this episode, Pete and Nikki unpack why that boom-and-bust cycle hits so hard for ADHD brains: the early dopamine of a new system (or a newly organized sock drawer), the unrealistic maintenance expectations baked into most productivity advice, and the emotional crash that follows when the setup doesn’t hold.
They dig into the real trap underneath the resolution mindset—living in the gap between who you were yesterday and who you hope to be tomorrow—and how to pull your attention back to the only place you actually have leverage: today. Along the way, they talk about why asking for help can feel so risky (hello, shame and RSD), how to regulate before you ask, and what it looks like to reframe help as advocacy instead of rescue. The goal isn’t becoming someone new. It’s learning to support the person you already are, with more time, more buffer, and a lot less self-punishment.
(00:00) - Welcome to Taking Control: The ADHD Podcast
(03:30) - Letting Go of the "This Year will be a Different Story" Story 😉
🎯 Ready to turn your planning chaos into clarity? Take a look at Guided Planning Sessions (GPS)—from getting started to mastering your weekly routines. Whether you’re just picking your tools or refining a system that finally sticks, GPS gives you the structure, support, and community you need to make it happen. Explore more and join today at TakeControlADHD.com/GPS.
Taking Control: The ADHD Podcast