The Dr. Psych Mom Show
with clinical psychologist
Dr. Samantha Rodman Whiten "She Divorced Me Because I Left Dishes By The Sink".... Interview With Matthew Fray!
4 snips
May 5, 2025 Matthew Fray, a relationship coach and author known for his viral post on marital responsibilities, shares captivating insights about marriage and divorce. He discusses the emotional complexities of relationships, emphasizing communication and empathy, especially regarding ADHD and attachment styles. Fray also dives into the concept of devil's advocacy in partnerships, revealing how men often value factual correctness over emotional support. The conversation highlights the importance of balancing responsibilities and understanding gender dynamics for healthier connections.
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ADHD and Mental Load Struggles
- Matthew Fray struggled with the mental load and ADHD from early in his marriage.
- The strain increased significantly after they had a child, exposing weaknesses in his contribution at home.
Pain Trumps Actions in Trust
- The pain caused by small actions like leaving a dish out matters because of its emotional impact.
- Painful actions communicate either intentional or accidental preference of self over the partner, damaging trust.
Balance Effort and Tolerance
- Ideally, men should try harder to put away dishes to reduce tension.
- Women should work on tolerating small issues like dishes by the sink as part of anxiety exposure therapy.
