Let's talk Transformation : The business leaders podcast #125 Likeable Badass with Alison Fragale
The easiest time to build your status is when you don’t need anything from somebody..
Are you ready to transform your career journey with science-based strategies? What if it wasn’t about power but about status ?
A fun & candid conversation with Alison about how as women we can move out of frustration and into personal agency and results in today’s workplace. Navigating the complexities of the workplace can often feel like an intricate dance, especially for women striving to make their mark and navigating status and the use of status can be useful here. Alison & I discuss facing these challenges by understanding the dynamics of status, power, negotiation, and influence, and understanding what it means for us as individuals.
We particularly explore the importance of status—rooted in both titles and personal qualities—for success and well-being, as well as fostering genuine networking and the concept of “assertive warmth” to gain respect through a blend of care and competence - being a likeable badass ! But how ?
Authenticity and strategy can coexist harmoniously : Imagine having a playbook that teaches you how to be both kind and assertive right from the beginning of your career - without compromising who you are, what you think or your intrinsic value base.
Likeable Badass is full of actionable strategies for building and communicating your authentic self more strategically and more effectively. These strategies work across different contexts and scenarios and give you the flexibility to adapt to every situation - you may find you are already doing some of them without realising !
Alison shares her stories, research and insights into how to intentionally craft being assertive and likeable and how to recognise your contributions without waiting for formal acknowledgment. I loved this book, an absolute must read for all women leaders !
The main insights you'll get from this episode are :
- Applying the science of human beings to work applications within the framework of organisational psychology and behaviour, in particular to help women, given that the workplace for women is not the same as it is for men.
- Success depends on influencing people and fundamental to this is the importance of status, a label that affects everyone but without us necessarily understanding what it is and knowing how to manage it strategically.
- Status is the respect and regard others have for you and can derive from many channels other than category, title, position or power - we must understand the science of respect and then act with authentic intention.
- Status is a non-negotiable basic human need as life is better when you feel respected; status decisions are not random and we must convince others that we are caring and capable and demonstrate this with authenticity.
- Assertive warmth is crucial: Are you good at what you do? Organised? In control of your environment? Confident? But are you also other-oriented and warm? Both are needed to convince people and earn respect, and women often feel that they can’t be both.
- Dual promotion is about celebrating your successes while shining a light on others at the same time – the concept of ‘other promoters’ is backed up by science and is particularly relevant for women in terms of caring and connecting.
- Science gives us a label for what women are already doing and provides women with a space to dial it up and help others; one effective way is via fractal mentoring, involving a diverse group of different mentors.
- Women tend to hoard ‘status miles’ – in the sense of air miles – instead of using them, but status is a resource to be used like any other to build respect and leverage it for the better.
- Status is also a finite resource, and we must be discerning about our behaviour – whilst it can be rebuilt, it can also be lost, and we have personal agency over the use of our resources.
- The cultural and generational differences between behaviours require awareness and we must know our audience if we are to:
· Understand the game, i.e. break down the science of status by framing it as a problem-solving activity approached with a playful attitude.
· Master the plays, i.e. knowing that our status is also built by what other people say about us, and we can act intentionally to boost this by promoting others first (principle of reciprocity).
· Coach others – always offering a space for others to listen and support their growth
- Everyone has something to offer, and we must start building status from the outset – being authentic and strategic are not mutually exclusive.
Find out more about Alison and her work here :
https://alisonfragale.substack.com/ (newsletter)