Exploring different attachment styles in relationships and the challenges of disorganized attachment. Discussing the impact of trauma on relationships and the need for healing and self-work. Emphasizing the importance of prioritizing healing before entering into relationships and making wise choices in dating. Highlighting the transformative role of supportive friends and partners in personal growth.
Read more
AI Summary
AI Chapters
Episode notes
auto_awesome
Podcast summary created with Snipd AI
Quick takeaways
The podcast discusses different attachment styles in relationships, such as insecure and anxious attachment, avoidant attachment, secure attachment, and disorganized attachment, which reflect the strengths and weaknesses developed based on the quality of care received as a child.
The episode emphasizes the importance of working on healing and addressing past trauma before entering a relationship, suggesting therapy, support groups, and personal growth, and advises being honest about the healing journey and allowing the person of interest to pursue their own life.
Deep dives
Different Attachment Styles
The podcast episode discusses different attachment styles in relationships, including insecure, anxious attachment, avoidant attachment, secure attachment, and disorganized attachment. Each attachment style reflects the strengths and weaknesses developed based on the quality of care received as a child.
Rain's Attachment Style
The episode explores Rain's attachment style, which seems to be a combination of fearful and avoidant, called disorganized attachment. This attachment style causes her to swing between intense longing and trying to hold on to a relationship, and then shutting down and pulling away, ultimately leading to difficulties in forming and maintaining healthy relationships.
Advice for Rain
The episode provides advice for Rain, highlighting the importance of working on her healing and addressing her past trauma before entering a relationship. It suggests seeking therapy, attending support groups, and focusing on personal growth and self-improvement. It advises Rain to be honest with the man she likes about her healing journey and to set him free to pursue his own life rather than making promises based on uncertain future circumstances.
Some people are insecure and anxious in relationships - this is a style of attachment where you constantly seek validation and love because you can’t stop fearing the person will leave. Some people have a more avoidant attachment style: They don’t like commitment, they can seem cold, and they can be quick to leave relationships as soon as it gets uncomfortable. But the hardest attachment style of all – where a person is both fearful AND avoidant – what is called “disorganized attachment." In this video I respond to a letter from a woman who swings between her intense longing for love and then shutting down and pulling away.