Luna Matatas, a seasoned Sex and Pleasure Educator, dives into the tantalizing world of rough sex and impact play. She shares how to explore sensations like spanking and hair pulling while emphasizing the power of communication. Luna discusses the difference between pain and pleasurable pain, ensuring safety and trust. She provides practical tips for introducing kink into relationships, proving you don’t need to be ‘kinky’ to embrace roughness. It’s a fun and insightful conversation that makes exploring desires feel accessible and empowering!
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question_answer ANECDOTE
Kinky Forest Camp And A Glory Hole
Luna described a kinky camping event with a forest glory hole, sex swing, mirror, and squirt pad set up.
People used the glory hole for solo or partnered play, appointments, or voyeuristic enjoyment.
insights INSIGHT
Rough Sex Is A Sensation Spectrum
Rough sex is a spectrum of sensation from soft to rough rather than a single style of touch.
Effective rough play still requires skillful touching and awareness of the other's body.
volunteer_activism ADVICE
Make Communication The Foreplay
Communicate intentions and specifics before attempting rough acts like choking so partners share the same vibe.
Ask about fantasy details: breath restriction, role, character, and the feeling someone wants to evoke.
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Curious about spanking, hair pulling, or a little consensual roughness... but not sure where to start? You're not alone. In this episode, we’re joined by Luna Matatas, a renowned Sex and Pleasure Educator known for her playful, trauma-informed approach to kink and impact play. With over 15 years of experience in the field, Luna walks us through how to explore rough sex in ways that feel hot, empowering, and safe.
We talk about how to build trust, use communication as foreplay, and find the confidence to go after what you really want in bed, without shame or second-guessing.
We cover:
What impact play actually is and what counts as "rough sex". From spanking to slapping to hair pulling, Luna breaks down what it means to play with power and sensation.
Why communication is the sexiest part of kink. Learn how to express what you want, ask for what you’re curious about, and create safety before the clothes come off.
The difference between pain and pleasurable pain. We unpack how intensity can feel good and how to find your own personal “yes” when exploring impact play.
How to introduce rough sex into your relationship without making it weird. Luna gives real-life scripts and ideas to help you start the convo (even if you’re nervous).
Why you don’t need to be “kinky” to enjoy rough sex. Spoiler: You don’t need a leather closet or a dungeon to explore power and pleasure.
What beginners get wrong about spanking and dominance. Tips for avoiding the most common mistakes and making your first experience feel hot (not awkward).
How to navigate insecurity, shame, or body image blocks. We talk about how to build confidence in yourself, especially if you feel hesitant about being “too much.”
Tools, toys, and mindset shifts to get started with impact play. Luna shares her favorite low-pressure ways to experiment, whether you’re solo or partnered.
Honeydew Me 