Connect2 Counselling Feature: On Infidelity, how do we Rebuild Trust?
Oct 2, 2024
In this insightful discussion, Kiat Yong, a seasoned counselor specializing in marriage and family therapy at Focus on the Family Singapore, shares his expertise on healing from infidelity. He emphasizes the critical role of motivation in recovery, detailing how couples can navigate their emotional turmoil. Kiat explains the importance of open communication and vulnerability in rebuilding trust, highlighting actionable steps for fostering connection and accountability. His insights pave a hopeful path toward establishing a 'new marriage' after betrayal.
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Healing from Infidelity's Emotional Turmoil
- Healing from infidelity involves enduring emotional pain and trauma, including symptoms like PTSD and hypervigilance.
- Both the betrayed and betrayer experience profound emotional upheavals requiring vulnerability and effort to recover.
Communicate Carefully and Clarify
- Use first-person statements to share emotions and avoid accusatory language to prevent defensiveness.
- Betrayed spouses need to ask many questions for reassurance but avoid explicit details that create harmful images.
Betrayer's Responsibility and Openness
- Betrayers often feel cornered and enter a shame cycle that fuels defensiveness and justification, delaying healing.
- They must take responsibility and be open with remorse to foster recovery in the marriage.