
Evolving Love #100 - What is Love? with Dr. Christopher Ryan - Author of "Sex at Dawn" & "Civilized to Death"
Dec 8, 2025
Dr. Christopher Ryan, renowned author of "Sex at Dawn" and "Civilized to Death," explores the intricate nature of love and desire. He argues that humans are inherently non-monogamous, yet monogamy can still hold value. Delving into societal shame and sexual repression, he emphasizes the importance of honesty and self-awareness in relationships. The discussion also touches on how technology, particularly AI, may impact intimacy, while distinguishing between mere sexual encounters and genuine connection. Prepare for a thought-provoking journey into the complexities of modern love!
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Episode notes
Human Nature Favors Erotic Variety
- Christopher Ryan argues Homo sapiens are a non-monogamous species while acknowledging monogamy can be a valid individual choice.
- Monogamy is compared to choosing vegetarianism within an omnivorous species: possible but counter to species-wide tendencies.
Look To Culture For Erotic Signals
- Use observable cultural cues like porn consumption and advertising to understand erotic novelty drives.
- Read Sex at Dawn as a gateway to examine how erotic appetites shape societies and personal choices.
Shame Fuels Societal Violence
- Ryan links social conditioning and repression to shame that fuels destructive behaviors like war.
- Allowing alignment with instinct reduces shame and the societal energy it channels into violence.








