Where Should We Begin? with Esther Perel Esther Calling - In Loving You, I Learned to Love Myself
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Nov 3, 2025 
In this heartfelt conversation, an anonymous caller shares his decades-long journey of unrequited love for a classmate from Jamaica, which unexpectedly guided his academic success in New Zealand. He reflects on how this early crush shaped his identity and led him to embrace his sexuality. As he navigates feelings of gratitude mixed with longing, Esther encourages him to consider the transformative power of self-love and mentoring others. The discussion beautifully intertwines themes of resilience, loneliness, and the complexity of human connections.
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First Crush Became Lifeline
- The guest fell in love with a classmate in Jamaica at age 11–12 and was gently told she loved him differently.
- That early friendship gave him reading, belonging, and academic tools that changed his life trajectory.
Recognition Can Redirect A Life
- The guest credits that classmate for sparking his academic curiosity and eventual PhD.
- Small acts of recognition can redirect life paths, separating capability from circumstance.
Love Stories That Opened Him Up
- The guest describes a whirlwind romance before migration that taught him how deeply he could love.
- A later spiritual relationship in New Zealand grounded him and expanded his sense of life beyond academics.
