The book explores how the ideas 'what doesn’t kill you makes you weaker,' 'always trust your feelings,' and 'life is a battle between good people and evil people' have become embedded in American culture. These 'Great Untruths' contradict basic psychological principles and ancient wisdom, leading to a culture of safetyism that interferes with young people’s social, emotional, and intellectual development. The authors investigate various social trends, including fearful parenting, the decline of unsupervised play, and the impact of social media, as well as changes on college campuses and the broader context of political polarization in America.
Through extensive interviews and pioneering research, Cindy M. Meston and David M. Buss uncover the multifaceted reasons women engage in sex, ranging from pleasure and health to more complex psychological and evolutionary motivations. The book delves into various aspects of female sexuality, including the use of sex for protection, status, resource acquisition, and even as a form of medication.
In 'When Men Behave Badly', David Buss delves into the evolutionary psychology behind male behaviors that interfere with women's choices and goals. The book identifies and documents various 'bad male behaviors' such as pretending to have more status or financial resources, engaging in secret sexual affairs, being hyper-vigilant and controlling, and physically and psychologically abusing women. Buss explains these behaviors through the lens of evolutionary selection, highlighting the role of the Dark Triad traits (narcissism, Machiavellianism, and psychopathy) in exacerbating these behaviors. The book also discusses how these behaviors can be addressed at both social and individual levels, emphasizing the need for women to be aware of these traits and for society to implement measures to prosecute and prevent such behaviors.
David Buss's "The Evolution of Desire" explores the evolutionary basis of human mating strategies and preferences. Buss integrates evolutionary theory with empirical research to explain patterns of attraction, mate selection, and relationship dynamics. He examines the differences between men and women's mating strategies, considering factors such as sexual selection and parental investment. The book challenges traditional views on relationships and offers a compelling perspective on the biological underpinnings of human behavior. It's a significant contribution to the field of evolutionary psychology.
This book, written by prominent psychologist David M. Buss, presents a unified theory of human mating behavior. It draws on a vast study involving over 10,000 people from thirty-seven cultures and compares human mating strategies with those of other species. Buss explores why human desires differ radically between men and women, and how conflict, competition, and manipulation are integral to human mating. The book updates the latest scientific research on human mating and explains the powerful evolutionary forces shaping our intimate desires.
In 'When Men Behave Badly', David Buss delves into the evolutionary psychology behind male behaviors that interfere with women's choices and goals. The book identifies and documents various 'bad male behaviors' such as pretending to have more status or financial resources, engaging in secret sexual affairs, being hyper-vigilant and controlling, and physically and psychologically abusing women. Buss explains these behaviors through the lens of evolutionary selection, highlighting the role of the Dark Triad traits (narcissism, Machiavellianism, and psychopathy) in exacerbating these behaviors. The book also discusses how these behaviors can be addressed at both social and individual levels, emphasizing the need for women to be aware of these traits and for society to implement measures to prosecute and prevent such behaviors.
In this episode, my guest is Dr. David Buss, Ph.D., Professor of Psychology at the University of Texas, Austin, and one of the founding members of the field of evolutionary psychology.
Dr. Buss describes his work on how people select mates for short and long-term relationships, the dynamics of human courtship, and mate value assessment — meaning how people measure up as potential partners. We also discuss the causes of infidelity and differences for infidelity in men and women. He explains how people evaluate and try to alter other people’s mate value as a means to secure and even poach mates. We discuss monogamous and non-monogamous relationships in humans. And we discuss what Dr. Buss calls “the dark triad” — features common in stalkers and narcissists that relate to sexual and psychological violence in relationships.
This episode is sure to be of interest to anyone single or in a relationship who seeks to know how people select mates and anyone who is interested in forming and maintaining healthy romantic partnerships.
Read the full show notes for this episode at hubermanlab.com.
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Timestamps
00:00:00 Introducing Dr. David Buss
00:04:27 Sponsors: AG1, LMNT & Waking Up
00:08:33 Choosing a Mate
00:13:40 Long Term Mates: Universal Desires
00:18:31 What Women & Men Seek in Long-Term Mates
00:25:10 Age Differences & Mating History
00:32:20 Deception in Courtship
00:37:30 Emotional Stability
00:38:40 Lying About Long-Term Interest
00:41:56 Short-Term Mating Criteria, Sliding Standards & Context Effects
00:46:25 Sexual Infidelity: Variety Seeking & (Un)happiness & Mate Switching
00:54:25 Genetic Cuckolds, How Ovulation Impacts Mate Preference
00:57:00 Long-Term vs. Short-Term Cheating, Concealment
00:59:15 Emotional & Financial Infidelity
01:04:35 Contraception
01:06:22 Status & Mating Success
01:10:10 Jealousy, Mate Value Discrepancies, Vigilance, Violence
01:24:13 Specificity of Intimate Partner Violence
01:25:12 Mate Retention Tactics: Denigration, Guilt, Etc.
01:27:33 Narcissism, Machiavellianism, Psychopathy
01:33:25 Stalking
01:39:15 Influence of Children on Mate Value Assessments
01:43:24 Attachment Styles, Mate Choice & Infidelity
01:46:40 Non-Monogamy, Unconventional Relationships
01:54:00 Mate Value Self Evaluation, Anxiety About the Truth
02:02:12 Self Deception
02:05:35 The Future of Evolutionary Psychology & Neuroscience
02:06:56 Books: When Men Behave Badly, The Evolution of Desire, Textbooks
02:10:42 Concluding Statements, Zero-Cost Support: Subscribe, Sponsors, Supplements
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