The Dr. Psych Mom Show
with clinical psychologist
Dr. Samantha Rodman Whiten In Their 40's, Many Women Stop Being The Preoccupied Attachment/Pursuer Partner
May 16, 2025
Women in their 40s often shift away from pursuing dynamics in relationships. This change raises questions about how avoidant partners feel amid this transition. The discussion touches on the impact of perimenopause and emotional challenges linked to decreased desire and energy. The narrative also emphasizes the crucial role women play in fostering intimacy and connection, countering traditional gender stereotypes. Additionally, couples therapy is highlighted as a valuable tool for enhancing emotional bonds, especially for parents navigating these changes.
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Preoccupied Women Pursue Avoidant Men
- Women with preoccupied attachment styles prioritize relationships and closeness much more than avoidant men.
- They act as the pursuers while the avoidant men distance themselves and prioritize hobbies and work.
Midlife Changes Reduce Pursuit
- Women in their 40s reduce pursuit due to lower estrogen and busier schedules as kids grow older.
- They feel angry about unmet emotional needs, impacting their desire for sex and closeness.
Avoidants Struggle Without Pursuit
- Avoidant men take female pursuit for granted and feel discomfort when it stops.
- When women stop pursuing, avoidant men feel uncertain and anxious about the relationship.