Outgrowing friendships is a natural part of growing up and discovering our true selves.
As we enter our 20s, friendships become more nuanced and emotionally complex, requiring us to be selective and prioritize quality over quantity.
Deep dives
Outgrowing Friends: The Natural Transition in our 20s
In our 20s, we often outgrow our childhood, high school, or university best friends as we undergo personal growth and transformation. Outgrowing friendships is a natural part of growing up and discovering our true selves. Our idea of friendship in our younger years is often unrealistic and highly romanticized, but as we enter our 20s, we realize that friendships are nuanced and can be emotionally complex. Quality over quantity becomes important, and we learn to be selective in focusing our love, appreciation, and time on the friendships that mean the most to us.
Factors Affecting Friendships
Several factors can alter the dynamics of friendships and contribute to outgrowing them. Distance, for instance, becomes more common in our 20s as friends move away, making maintaining the same level of closeness challenging. Serious romantic partners also impact friendships, as our primary relationships shift to prioritize time with our partners. Priorities and values may differ among friends, which can strain relationships. As we grow up and change, the shared experiences and compatibility that once bonded us may fade, leading to a natural drift apart. These factors contribute to the fizzle, a slow burnout of a friendship rather than a sudden breakup.
Navigating the Transition and Embracing Solitude
Outgrowing friends can be an emotionally complex experience, but it is essential to accept and embrace the natural changes in friendships. Recognizing signs of drifting and understanding when friendships have become one-sided or rooted in the past can help guide the transition. It is important to end friendships kindly and gracefully, acknowledging the changes and making space for new connections. Embracing solitude and valuing time spent alone allows for self-reflection, independence, and the opportunity to meet new, more aligned friends. Outgrowing friendships is a normal and beneficial part of personal growth in our 20s.
This week on the show we deep dive into why we outgrow our friendships as we enter our 20’s. We often have a romanticised idea that friendships last a lifetime, but during this decade we realise that it’s a lot more nuanced. We explore the main factors behind the friendship “fizzle”, why it’s a normal part of growing up, how we can handle the emotions that come along with and learn to value solitude and be selective when it comes to our friendships. Listen now!