When Life Falls Apart: How to Grow and Heal After Total Life Changes | Happiness | E496

What do you do when you're blindsided by unexpected and total life changes? I’m talking about the kind that shatter your sense of identity, happiness, and success all at once. How do you manage those overwhelming emotions and find a direction again? In this episode, you’ll learn just that: how to grow and heal when everything falls apart, find direction when you’re feeling trapped, and rebuild your sense of well-being for a new version of love, happiness, and success.

I’m joined by Maya Shankar, a cognitive scientist, creator of the podcast A Slight Change of Plans, and the first Behavioral Science Advisor to the United Nations. Maya brings both personal experience and research-backed insight to the question so many people ask during major life transitions: Why does this feel so exhausting, disorienting, and scary — and how do I move forward without losing myself?

Together, we talk about why life changes often feel like a threat to your identity, why uncertainty can drain your energy, and why there’s no single “right” way to grieve after major life events. Maya shares gentle, practical ways to begin healing that don’t require pushing yourself to be positive, rushing the process, or overhauling your life when you’re already tired.

As you listen, I’d invite you to reflect on this: When so much has changed at once, what parts of you are still here? And what might become possible if this chapter isn’t the end of your story, but the beginning of something different?

Episode Breakdown

00:00 When Life Falls Apart

01:23 Why Total Life Changes Feel So Destabilizing

01:55 Maya’s Story: Losing Big Dreams During Major Life Changes

07:10 How Life Transitions Threaten Identity

07:44 Finding Your “Why” After Everything Changes

11:17 There’s No One Right Way To Grieve Life Events

15:51 Why Uncertainty Is So Exhausting During Life Changes

22:33 A Self-Affirmation Tool For Identity After Total Life Changes

28:20 Moral Elevation: Finding Hope During Difficult Life Transitions

37:14 Why Community Helps You Heal After Major Life Events

42:35 Shared Psychology: Different Life Changes, Same Emotional Truths

45:40 Share This Episode With Someone Navigating Change

If you’re living through total life changes right now and could use steady, thoughtful support as you find your footing again, I want to offer you something. I’ve created a simple way for you to schedule a free consultation that’s designed to truly meet you where you are.

By answering three quick questions, you’ll be personally matched with the counselor or coach who’s best suited for what you’re navigating right now. This is a private, secure process, it only takes a couple of minutes, and it’s my way of making sure you don’t have to figure all of this out on your own.

If this episode helped you put language to what you’ve been carrying, consider this an open door.

xoxo,

Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby

Growing Self