Everything Happens with Kate Bowler Naming the Silences with Miriam Toews
Oct 21, 2025
Miriam Toews, an acclaimed Canadian novelist known for poignant works like All My Puny Sorrows, delves into the impacts of silence around mental illness in her community. She explores the complexities of Mennonite identity and the burden of guilt and shame that often lingers in tight-knit groups. Amidst personal stories of her family's struggles, Miriam emphasizes the need for honest conversations about pain and the importance of empathy. With a blend of humor and honesty, she demonstrates how joy can coexist with sorrow.
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Two Kinds Of Silence
- Silence can be sacred or devastating depending on whether it allows grief to land or hides pain from view.
- Miriam Toews shows that communities often hold both kinds of silences simultaneously.
Father's Hidden Bipolar Struggle
- Miriam Toews' father was diagnosed with bipolar disorder at 17 and lived with it in a community that didn't accept mental illness.
- He kept it hidden, faced shame, and eventually took his own life amid rumors and silence.
Sister's Long Descent Into Illness
- Miriam's older sister pursued education and culture but later returned home bedridden by depression and repeated suicide attempts.
- The family recognized she would likely end her life despite efforts to help and understand.
