The Libido Fairy Podcast #94: Why You Need To STOP Trying To Spice Things Up (And What To Do Instead)
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Jun 30, 2025 The podcast dives into why the advice to 'spice things up' can be detrimental to couples. Instead, it emphasizes the importance of understanding emotional and psychological factors that impact intimacy. Listeners are encouraged to embrace slowness, prioritizing genuine connection over superficial thrills. With five insightful tips, the discussion focuses on creating lasting desire and pleasure by fostering deeper connections and engaging in self-exploration.
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Hannah's Burnt Toast Analogy
- Hannah shares a personal experience of feeling frozen and dreading sex despite loving her partner.
- She tried the usual "spice things up" advice but found it did not address the root issue of pressure and disconnect.
Practice Presence Over Novelty
- Increase presence and go slower during intimate moments to avoid autopilot and enhance sensation.
- Focus your attention on bodily sensations and your partner's skin to deepen connection.
Discover What Turns You On
- Explore and understand what turns you on instead of performing to please your partner.
- Self-exploration helps identify preferred touch and sensory responses, improving sexual fulfillment.