Understanding Ego Depletion in Conversations and Negotiations

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Chris Voss: How to Succeed at Hard Conversations

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CHAPTER

Understanding Ego Depletion in Conversations and Negotiations

This chapter delves into the psychological phenomenon of ego depletion, highlighting its connection to decision fatigue and dopamine's role in behavior. It examines how exhausting defensive efforts can weaken resolve in negotiations, supported by practical examples and the importance of rest in conflict resolution.

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In this episode, my guest is Chris Voss, a former Federal Bureau of Investigation (FBI) agent who was the lead negotiator in many high-risk, high-consequence cases. Chris has taught negotiation courses at Harvard and Georgetown Universities and is the author of the book “Never Split the Difference.” We discuss how to navigate difficult conversations of all kinds, including in business, romance and romantic breakups, job firings and tense conversations with family and friends. Chris explains how to navigate online, in person and in written negotiations, the red flags to watch out for and how to read body and voice cues in face-to-face and phone conversations. He explains how to use empathy, certain key questions, proactive listening, emotional processing and more to ensure you reach the best possible outcome in any hard conversation. This episode ought to be of interest to anyone looking to improve their interpersonal abilities and communication skills and for those who want to be able to keep a level head in heated discussions.

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