Monica (36) and Michael (33) have been married just over a year and are navigating the pressures of new parenthood—but Monica feels like she’s doing it alone. She pays the rent, covers childcare, and works a demanding job, while Michael juggles three jobs and carries shame about his income and past financial mistakes—including an eviction he never told her about.
Despite a recent 50% salary increase, Michael didn’t share the news, reinforcing Monica’s sense that she’s carrying the emotional and financial load. Can Ramit help them rebuild trust, communicate transparently, and step into a true financial partnership?
In this episode we uncover:
• Michael’s quiet shame about earning less
• How an eviction early in their relationship shattered Monica’s trust
• The $95K salary increase Michael never told her about
• Why Michael’s “Swiss Army knife” mentality is sabotaging their relationship
• What Monica really means when she says she wants a financial partner
• Why transparency is still a major hurdle
• The emotional gap in their relationship, and how it’s showing up in everything from birthday celebrations to debt payoff plans
• What finally shifts when Michael shares his debt-free timeline
Chapters:
(00:00:00) “I feel like a leech”
(00:18:28) Ramit breaks down their numbers
(00:25:56) “I got a 50% raise…and didn’t tell her”
(00:33:24) Why she’s always the last to know about his money
(00:42:59) The secret that shattered her trust early on
(00:46:26) He paid off half his debt—but still struggles to celebrate it
(01:00:03) Torn between faith and financial goals
(01:04:38) When earning more still isn’t enough
(01:26:25) Are they finally rowing in the same direction?
(01:35:17) Where are they now? Monica and Michael’s follow-ups
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Links mentioned in this episode
• Get tickets for my next live events—September 14 in Atlanta and September 26 in Los Angeles—at iwt.com/events
Connect with Ramit
• Get my new book, Money For Couples
• Get Money Coaching with Ramit
• Download the Conscious Spending Plan
• Listen to my book—now on Audible
• Get my New York Times best-selling book
• Get my no-numbers journal
• Other episodes
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If you and your partner have a money issue and you want my help, I occasionally select a couple to work with, free of charge. Apply for my help here.
