148. The 80/80 Marriage: A Radical Approach to Relationship Bliss | w/ Nate And Kaley Klemp
The Intimate Marriage Podcast, with Intimacy Coach Alexandra Stockwell, MD
The Ripple Effect of Fairness and the Victim Mindset
The speakers discuss how fairness, initially seen as an aspiration in many couples, led to keeping score and resentment. They describe the shift towards a team-based approach and reorganizing the architecture of their marriage. This mindset had a ripple effect on their relationship.
Alexandra Stockwell, MD is joined by Nate and Kaley Klemp, authors of "The 80/80 Marriage" to discuss their journey from a failing relationship to a thriving partnership.
They challenge the idea of fairness in marriage and introduce "radical generosity" instead. This episode emphasizes intention, contribution, appreciation, and open communication as foundations for a healthy and sexually satisfying relationship. Listeners gain insights into overcoming resentment, fostering deeper connections, and redefining marriage dynamics. The contagious nature of mindset in the context of relationships is explored. The Klemps describe role-swap experiments for empathy-building among couples and share how to transform your marriage into an "80/80" partnership, in order to enjoy a harmonious and loving relationship.
Also in this episode:
- From Fairytale To Struggle: The beginning of their marriage was like a fairy tale, but it quickly became challenging when they faced the reality of balancing individual success with sharing a life together.
- A Prolonged Difficulty: Nate's bike accident, which led to anxiety and depression, and the shift from individual success to shared life responsibilities.
- The Key Turning Point: Shifting their focus from "what's best for me" to "what's best for us as a family." This change in perspective helped them reconcile the tension between individual pursuits and shared responsibilities.
- A Healthy Marriage: Featuring the importance of intention, generosity, appreciation, and open communication in shaping a healthy and balanced marriage.
- Stop Worrying About Fairness: They advocate for moving away from a fairness mindset to one of radical generosity in relationships.
Connect With Nate And Kaley Klemp:
Website: https://www.8080marriage.com
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/8080marriage/
The Free Date Night Guide: https://www.8080marriage.com/free
About Nate And Kaley Klemp:
Nate and Kaley Klemp are authors of the New York Times Editors’ Choice selection The 80/80 Marriage: A New Model for a Happier, Stronger Marriage. Nate is a founding partner at Mindful Magazine and also the coauthor of the New York Times Bestseller Start Here: Master the Lifelong Habit of Wellbeing. He holds a B.A. and M.A. in philosophy from Stanford University and a PhD from Princeton University. Kaley is one of the nation's leading experts on small-group dynamics and leadership development, a TEDx speaker, and the author of three other books, including the Amazon Bestseller The 15 Commitments of Conscious Leadership, The Drama-Free Office, and 13 Guidelines for Effective Teams. She is a graduate of Stanford University, where she earned a B.A. in International Relations and an M.A. in Sociology, with a focus on Organizational Behavior.
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Get your copy of “Uncompromising Intimacy” by Dr. Alexandra Stockwell here: https://amzn.to/2ymI3Hl Download the first chapter of Dr Alexandra’s bestselling book, “Uncompromising Intimacy,” here: https://www.alexandrastockwell.com/book
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About Alexandra Stockwell, MD
Known as “The Intimacy Doctor,” Alexandra Stockwell, MD is a Relationship and Intimacy Coach and an Intimate Marriage Expert who specializes in coaching ambitious, successful couples to build beautiful, long-lasting, passionate relationships. She is the bestselling author of “Uncompromising Intimacy,” host of The Intimate Marriage Podcast and creator of the Aligned & Hot Marriage program.
For over two decades, she’s been guiding men and women to bring pleasure and purpose into all aspects of life— from the daily grind of running a household to creating ecstatic experiences in the bedroom—all while maintaining extraordinary professional success!
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The Intimate Marriage Podcast, With Intimacy Coach, Alexandra Stockwell, MD
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