Building Trust Through Demonstration

🎙️Episode 19: Embracing Choice, Creativity, and Freedom with Steve Chandler 🎧

So first things first - the thumbnail is Midjourney’s best shot at turning Steve into Merlin (listen to the conversation and you’ll get reference), so apologies to Steve if it isn’t quite fully him!

As cliched as it may sound, it really is a great honour (for me - I’ll own it!) to have Steve as my first guest on AoE. Steve was a mentor and teacher to me some decade back who truly changed my whole way of relating to life. Steve is an Author, Teacher, Coach and Mindshifter Extraordinaire - you can find his books on Amazon and more about his general goodness at SteveChandler.com.

🔍 Episode Contents:1. The ‘I that Chooses

- Steve takes about how he learned to escape his history ad story of self and centre himself in the ‘I that Chooses’.

- 12 Step (Alcoholics Anonymous) as a spiritual system that operates beyond the Ego.

2. Trusting Ahead of Time vs. Testing Ahead of Time

- Steve Chandler's emphasis on the idea that trusting ahead of time can shut people down from taking action or enjoying life.

- Chandler promotes the concept of testing instead of trying to trust, citing an example of how jumping into the swimming pool and testing buoyancy led to trust.

3. Keeping It Simple: Creating Agreements and Expectations

- Chandler's belief in keeping things simple for people to understand and act on, emphasizing creating agreements rather than having expectations.

- James Tripp's discussion on the harmonization and fit of distinctions, the black path of letting go and releasing versus the white path of engagement and creation.

4. Creating vs. Reacting: The Power of Choice and Creativity

- Discussion on the distinction between creating versus reacting, emphasizing the power of choice and creativity over victimhood and struggles.

- Importance of agency and how people organize their power in their lives, and Chandler's explanation of the choice to expand from owner versus victim to reaction versus creation for a wider positive context.

5. Creativity and Intuition in Coaching and Life

- Emphasis on not being restrained by rigid methods and rules, and the power of using personal, alive stories in coaching.

- James Tripp's experience of transitioning to a more free and creative way of coaching, citing personal growth and the importance of engaging in the unfolding process.

6. Lifestyle Choices Over Financial Success

- Chandler's discussion of the pressure to constantly aim for higher income and success, emphasizing personal freedom and lifestyle choices over financial success.

- Tripp's experience of feeling pressured to raise his fees and achieve high business success, despite having a comfortable life and personal freedom.

7. Overcoming Struggles and Choosing the Life You Want

- Chandler's past struggles and how he overcame them to choose the life he wanted in the present moment.

- Chandler's freedom from alcohol and drugs through a 12-step program, where he realized he wasn't just a collection of bad memories.

- The distinction between essential self-concept and intentional self-concept in narrative therapy.

8. The Power of Distinctions in Coaching and Simplifying Choices

- Importance of using distinctions in coaching as a way to simplify and empower clients.

- Power of allowing change and not pressuring oneself to change.

- Chandler emphasizes the importance of relaxation, openness, and creativity in enabling change.

9. Overcoming Limiting Beliefs and Trances

- Criticizing the labeling and beliefs that prevent people from realizing their capacity for change.

- The influence of trances and the need to free oneself from restrictive trances.

10. The Unconscious Influence of Culture and Media on Beliefs and Behaviors

- Chandler highlights the unconscious influence of culture, media, and society on people's beliefs and behaviors.

11. Writing in Flow and the Writing Process

- Chandler discusses his approach to writing in flow, emphasizing the importance of deep relaxation, intuition, and impulse during the initial writing process.

- Chandler shares that he focuses on total freedom of expression in the beginning and then edits later to ensure the understanding of the material.

12. Coaching, Communication, and Client Relationship Building

- James Tripp shares that people often come to him for coaching after testing him through his audios, books, and online presence before seeking his coaching services.

- The significance of creating a "mind shift" in individuals to facilitate coaching and avoid the need to convince them to work with him.

- Importance of sharing personal experiences to help clients realize that their issues are common and not unique, allowing them to open up more.

13. Impactful Communication and Writing

- Importance of writing in a way that can be easily understood and relatable, drawing on Chandler's experience as a songwriter.

- Tripp's transition from being a hypnotist to a coach, utilising Chandler's advice to "transcend and include."

As always, I hope you get much goodness from this episode of Agents of Everything - if you so and would like to deepen your engagement, please consider joining the Agents of Everything Nexus - a Live monthly open frame mentoring call plus ongoing license to ask me anything plus access to the nexus resource library (over 270 sessions on creating yourself creator of a life that you love).

All the very best

James Tripp

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