Iy, the story is long, but maybe it is not all needed to give you the answers. Ok? The image of the person i thought i am got destroyed, and now i feel dead inside. And then someh happened again that stabbed that image again. I don't know who i am now. Nothing matters. But i don't want to kill myself because i don't even know who is that myself. What do you think about it? What would you suggest for first time people? Welcome.