The Conversational Intelligence

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I love the practice of honor the emotion that coached the behavior and what that looks like is, hey, Pete, it's okay that you're upset right now. When I'm working on a team, I love using language of observation and then an invitation. This actually comes from my colleague, Jill Mata, Villanova Mitchell,. It's asking for a do over. One of the hardest things to do is to really honestly apologize when you've hurt somebody. That can be really, really hard.

Sarah Noll Wilson shows how avoidance harms work and relationships.

— YOU’LL LEARN —

1) The many consequences of avoiding conflict

2)The key to overcoming avoidance

3) How to train your body’s fight-or-flight response

Subscribe or visit AwesomeAtYourJob.com/ep819 for clickable versions of the links below.

— ABOUT SARAH —

Through her work as an Executive Coach, an in-demand Keynote Speaker, Researcher, Contributor to Harvard Business Review, and Bestselling Author of “Don’t Feed the Elephants”, Sarah Noll Wilson helps leaders close the gap between what they intend to do and the actual impact they make. She hosts the podcast “Conversations on Conversations”, is certified in Co-Active Coaching, Conversational Intelligence, and is a frequent guest lecturer at universities. In addition to her work with organizations, Sarah is a passionate advocate for mental health.

With 15+ years in leadership development, Sarah earned a Master’s Degree from Drake University in Leadership Development and a BA from the University of Northern Iowa in Theatre Performance and Theatre Education. When she isn’t helping people build and rebuild relationships, she enjoys playing games with her husband Nick and cuddling with their fur baby, Sally.

• Book: Don't Feed the Elephants!: Overcoming the Art of Avoidance to Build Powerful Partnerships

• LinkedIn: Sara Noll Wilson

• Twitter: @sarahnollwilson

• Website: SarahNollWilson.com

— RESOURCES MENTIONED IN THE SHOW —

• Book: Conversational Intelligence: How Great Leaders Build Trust and Get Extraordinary Results by Judith Glaser

• Book: Insight: Why We're Not as Self-Aware as We Think, and How Seeing Ourselves Clearly Helps Us Succeed at Work and in Life by Tasha Eurich

• Book: Right Within: How to Heal from Racial Trauma in the Workplace by Minda Harts

• Book: The Memo: What Women of Color Need to Know to Secure a Seat at the Table by Minda Harts

• Book: The Waymakers: Clearing the Path to Workplace Equity with Competence and Confidence by Tara Jaye Frank

• Book: Triggers: Creating Behavior That Lasts--Becoming the Person You Want to Be by Marshall Goldsmith and Mark Reiter

• Previous episode: 798: How to Have Difficult Conversations about Race with Kwame Christian