250. How to Navigate Conflict: Tools For Productive Communication
Think Fast Talk Smart: Communication Techniques
Notice motive shifts in the moment
Joseph Grenny explains how to detect when motives change to winning and asks two questions to reset toward long-term goals.
Celebrate our 250th episode with expert strategies that make tough conversations easier — and more meaningful.
Some of the most meaningful shifts in how we communicate come from the moments that challenge us the most. In this special 250th episode of Think Fast Talk Smart, Matt Abrahams reflects on the insights that have shown him how conflict can become a catalyst for clarity, connection, and even compassion.
From Amy Gallo’s reminder that the “right kind of conflict” leads to better outcomes to Jenn Wynn’s framework for calming our nervous system before stepping into a hard conversation and Julia Minson’s HEAR method for signaling genuine curiosity, each tool helps turn tension into understanding for every stage of conflict. And with Joseph Grenny’s guidance on noticing when our motives shift from problem-solving to winning, this episode highlights how self-awareness can reset even the toughest moments.
Whether you’re navigating workplace disagreements or everyday friction at home, this milestone episode offers practical ways to make difficult dialogue feel less daunting — and a real opportunity to communicate better.
Episode Reference Links:
- Amy Gallo
- Amy’s Book: Getting Along: How to Work With Anyone
- Ep.144 Communicating Through Conflict: How to Get Along with Anyone
- Jenn Wynn
- Jenn’s Podcast: The H.I. Note: Healing Inspirations from Life
- Ep.222 Discussing Through Discomfort: Why the Conversations You Avoid Cost You the Most
- Julia Minson
- Ep.136 The Art of Disagreeing Without Conflict: Navigating the Nuance
- Joseph Grenny
- Joseph’s Book: Crucial Conversations
- Ep.207 From Conflict to Connection: Having Crucial Conversations that Count
Music from Blue Dot Sessions:
Etude 3 Chessanta
Etude 1 Cherub
Connect:
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- Episode Transcripts >>> Think Fast Talk Smart Website
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- Think Fast Talk Smart >>> LinkedIn, Instagram, YouTube
- Matt Abrahams >>> LinkedIn
Timed Links:
- (1:45) Getting Along: How to Work With Anyone
- (18:31) Crucial Conversations
Chapters:
- (00:00) - Introduction
- (03:27) - Why Conflict Is Necessary
- (04:26) - Transforming Unproductive Conflict
- (05:14) - Inner Experience of Difficult Conversations
- (06:10) - Self-Awareness, Pause, Reframe
- (08:17) - Four Questions For Understanding
- (11:36) - Acting Curious vs. Feeling Curious
- (13:52) - The HEAR Framework
- (18:10) - Humility & Willingness To Be Wrong
- (19:41) - Practice & Repetition
- (21:08) - Acknowledging Motives
- (22:22) - Two Questions to Reset Motives
- (24:16) - Bringing the Frameworks Together
- (25:42) - What Really Matters
- (27:14) - Conclusion
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