What is a Good Life? #158 | Finding Self-Love Beyond Achievement

Where do you belong? How do you best use your gifts?

These questions have followed Alan Wilson throughout his life—from childhood football pitches to corporate boardrooms. In this deeply honest conversation, Alan shares his journey from seeking external validation to cultivating self-love, exploring how grief, self-inquiry, and simple presence have reshaped his understanding of a good life.

Alan Wilson is a Director of People & Operations and qualified coach with 17+ years in senior leadership roles. He supports leaders and organisations navigating change by combining commercial insight with a deeply human approach—focused on self-awareness, integrity, and sustainable performance.

In this episode:

The childhood patterns behind our adult struggles
Why achievement never feels like enough
Finding centre in an increasingly distracted world
How children guide us back to presence
Why self-love transforms leadership
The agency we have despite feeling disempowered

This conversation is for anyone questioning whether they're enough, struggling with validation, or wondering if there's more to life than the next achievement.

For more of Alan's work:
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/alan-wilson-084b3324/

For more from Mark McCartney:
Newsletter: https://www.whatisagood.life/
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/mark-mccartney-14b0161b4/
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@whatisagoodlife
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/markcmccartney/

00:00 - Where Do I Belong?
05:23 - The Validation Trap
10:47 - Self-Inquiry and Grief
16:12 - Moments That Allow Breathing
21:35 - Toxicity and Modern Life
27:43 - Children as Our Compass
33:21 - Beyond Material Accumulation
38:45 - Dismantling the Armour
44:02 - Agency in a Disempowered World
49:18 - Transmitting Our Gifts Daily
54:31 - A Life That's Evolving

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