Navigating the Complexities of Attraction

Evolutionary psychologist, Doug Lisle, PhD discusses listener questions with co-host, Nathan Gershfeld.

Q1: How does one know if or when it is time to settle in dating? I’m 45 years old and have only dated men who I would consider a friend, and have never met anyone who excites me like a romantic partner would. Therefore, I let these men go, kept looking for the next best thing and never found it. Is there a point in life where we should just realize that this partner is the best we are ever going to get even though they are different than what we imagined? Is there a point where we should settle and stop looking even if we are not super excited about that person and how do we know when? At 45 I still consider myself good looking but I’m past my prime, so should I just settle for one of these “friends”?

0:00 Teaser Clips & Intro

1:35 Q1 - Should I lower my standards and settle?  I'm 45 and haven't yet found a partner that excites me.

5:45 General mood model – where does excitement comes from?

14:13 A common strategy for women

18:23 Women are told to lower their standards

23:41 Why are looks so important?  

28:40 Changing the strategy

31:15 A request for David Buss or Geoffrey Miller – is there scientific evidence for Repeat Exposure in women?

37:11 Things to watch out for.

X: @BeatYourGenes

Web: www.beatyourgenes.org

Doug Lisle, PhD www.esteemdynamics.com

Nathan Gershfeld, DC www.fastingescape.com

Intro & outro song: City of Happy Ones • Ferenc Hegedus Licensed for use

Copyright Beat Your Genes Podcast