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The Role of Parenting in Attachment
Stephanie Coontz: When a child is in distress with no one there to help regulate them, what a child needs is someone who is in their state of ventral. She says when we have a rupture or an argument occur, it's as if we've time traveled to being that infant again. But most people are looking for their partner to pick the young part up, rescue me, save me from this experience," she says. "It can be helpful for a little bit like a band aid, but it'll just come back again and again"