Ep 303: The Loneliness of the Indian Man
The Seen and the Unseen - hosted by Amit Varma
My Father Was Always Like, I'm Not Going to Be a Banker, You Know, but You Don't Have to Work for Him
"I was always like, I'm going to be absolute opposite of my father in every possible way," she says. "He had anxiety issues, which I much later found out." She feels bad for treating him as a son even though at the time he treated her that same way. He's never really been violent in a domestic violence way, but he just didn't have an emotional quotient and grew up with no support system.
Women are not the only victims of patriarchy -- men are also diminished by it. Nikhil Taneja joins Amit Varma in episode 303 of The Seen and the Unseen to discuss what he has learnt about mental health, young people in India, the epidemic of loneliness in our country -- and the enormous power of storytelling. (For full linked show notes, go to SeenUnseen.in.) Also check out: 1. The Loneliness of the Indian Woman — Episode 259 of The Seen and the Unseen (w Shrayana Bhattacharya). 2. Nikhil Taneja on Twitter, Instagram, LinkedIn, IMDb and HT Brunch. 3. Yuvaa. 4. The internet—a toxic love story -- Nikhil Taneja. 5. The pandemic pretence of being ‘okay’ -- Nikhil Taneja. 6. Keeping up with the algorithms -- Nikhil Taneja. 7. It is okay for men to cry -- Nikhil Taneja. 8. Reject the mission statement of your gender -- Nikhil Taneja. 9. Kindness: Don't be an A**hole! -- Nikhil Taneja. 10. Why young Indians are lonelier than ever before -- Nikhil Taneja. 11. How stories can heal our divided world -- Nikhil Taneja. 12. Nikhil Taneja on Advertising is Dead with Varun Duggirala. 13. Nikhil Taneja on the Filter Koffee Podcast with Karthik Nagarajan. 14. The Hunter Becomes the Hunted — Episode 200 of The Seen and the Unseen. 15. Episodes on The Seen and the Unseen that touched on feminism & gender with Paromita Vohra, Kavita Krishnan, Mrinal Pande, Kavitha Rao, Namita Bhandare, Shrayana Bhattacharya, Mukulika Banerjee, Manjima Bhattacharjya, Nilanjana Roy, Urvashi Butalia, Mahima Vashisht, Alice Evans, Ashwini Deshpande and Natasha Badhwar. 16. Hitesh Kewalya on Twitter, Instagram and IMDb. 17. Shubh Mangal Saavdhan and Shubh Mangal Zyada Saavdhan. 18. Dev Anand and Roger Corman. 19. The Reflections of Samarth Bansal -- Episode 299 of The Seen and the Unseen. 20. This Be The Verse — Philip Larkin. 21. Caste, Capitalism and Chandra Bhan Prasad — Episode 296 of The Seen and the Unseen. 22. Gendered Leadership Course by Angellica Aribam. 23. Young India — Episode 83 of The Seen and the Unseen (w Snigdha Poonam). 24. Dreamers — Snigdha Poonam. 25. Men Must Step Up Now -- Amit Varma. 26. Beedi Jali Le -- Song from Omkara. 27. NH 10 (Navdeep Singh), Hichki (Siddharth Malhotra), Chhapaak (Meghna Gulzar), Rashmi Rocket (Akarsh Khurana) and Queen (Vikas Bahl). 28. Ghostbusters (2016, Paul Feig) and The Lost City (Nee Brothers). 29. 3 Idiots (Rajkumar Hirani), Dangal (Nitesh Tiwari), Badhaai Ho (Amit Ravindernath Sharma), Kantara (Rishab Shetty) and Thugs of Hindostan (Vijay Krishna Acharya). 30. Aamir Khan on Koffee With Karan (2018). 31. Parasite -- Bong Joon-ho. 32. Asghar Farhadi on Wikipedia and IMDb. 33. Delhi Crime. 34. TikTok and Indian Society -- The online course conducted by Amit Varma, now no longer on offer. 35. Vicky Donor (Shoojit Sircar) and RRR (SS Rajamouli). 36. Salim-Javed. 37. Range Rover — The archives of Amit Varma’s poker column for the Economic Times. 38. Dilwale Dulhania Le Jayenge (Aditya Chopra) and Kaho Naa... Pyaar Hai (Rakesh Roshan). 39. Dev D (Anurag Kashyap), Udaan (Vikramaditya Motwane) and Oye Lucky Oye Lucky (Dibakar Banerjee). 40. Bhuvam Bam, Prajakta Koli and Amit Bhadana. 41. Man's World (Y-Films) and Ki & Ka (R Balki). 42. The Refreshing Audacity of Vinay Singhal — Episode 291 of The Seen and the Unseen. 43. Mumbai Diaries 26/11 -- NIkhil Advani. 44. 1000 True Fans — Kevin Kelly. 45. 1000 True Fans? Try 100 — Li Jin. 46. If You Are a Creator, This Is Your Time -- Amit Varma. 47. Episodes of The Seen and the Unseen on the creator ecosystem with Roshan Abbas, Varun Duggirala, Neelesh Misra, Snehal Pradhan, Chuck Gopal, Nishant Jain, Deepak Shenoy and Abhijit Bhaduri. 48. One Cut of the Dead — Shin’ichirō Ueda. 49. Dance Dance For the Halva Waala -- Episode 294 of The Seen and the Unseen (w Jai Arjun Singh and Subrat Mohanty). 50. Steven Soderbergh, Kevin Smith (Clerks), Sofia Coppola and Richard Linklater. 51. The Life and Work of Ashwini Deshpande -- Episode 298 of The Seen and the Unseen. 52. Ingmar Bergman, Federico Fellini and Mani Kaul. 53. Andaz Apna Apna (Rajkumar Santoshi), Gunda (Kanti Shah) and Disco Dancer (Babbar Subhash). 54. Womaning in India With Mahima Vashisht -- Episode 293 of The Seen and the Unseen. 55. Womaning in India — Mahima Vashisht’s newsletter. 56. Desperately Seeking Shah Rukh: India’s Lonely Young Women and the Search for Intimacy and Independence — Shrayana Bhattacharya. 57. Memories and Things — Episode 195 of The Seen and the Unseen (w Aanchal Malhotra). 58. Remnants of a Separation — Aanchal Malhotra. 59. Shravana Kumara, the pious son. 60. Kavitha Rao and Our Lady Doctors — Episode 235 of The Seen and the Unseen (w Kavitha Rao). 61. Lady Doctors: The Untold Stories of India’s First Women in Medicine — Kavitha Rao. 62. Penelope Fitzgerald on Amazon and Wikipedia. 63. Roshan Abbas and the Creator Economy -- Episode 239 of The Seen and the Unseen. 64. Kuch Kuch Hota Hai -- Karan Johar. 65. The Chaos Machine -- Max Fisher. 66. The Social Dilemma -- Jeff Orlowski. 67. The Flying Spaghetti Monster. 68. Coming Out as Bisexual -- Mohit's talk at Main Hoon Yuvaa. 69. Nikhil Taneja's Twitter thread on his anxiety. 70. Nikhil Taneja's Facebook post on his anxiety. 71. Chandrahas Choudhury’s Country of Literature — Episode 288 of The Seen and the Unseen. 72. Turtles All the Way Down -- John Green. 73. Don’t think too much of yourself. You’re an accident — Amit Varma’s column on Chris Cornell’s death. 74. The Road to Freedom — Arthur C Brooks. 75. Amit Varma's favourite shower gel. 76. The Prem Panicker Files — Episode 217 of The Seen and the Unseen. 77. Amitava Kumar Finds the Breath of Life — Episode 265 of The Seen and the Unseen. 78. Schitt's Creek, Kim's Convenience and Parks and Recreation. 79. Greatest Events of WWII in Colour -- The Netflix docuseries mentioned by Nikhil. 80. Zeynep Tufekci’s newsletter, Twitter and column archive. 81. Ed Yong on Twitter, Amazon, The Atlantic and his own website. 82. My Friend Dropped His Pants -- Amit Varma. 83. Love Actually, Four Weddings and a Funeral and Notting Hill by Richard Curtis. 84. Project Everyone. 85. Ladies Room, 6 Pack Band and Bang Baaja Baaraat. 86. Maja Ma -- Anand Tiwari. 87. Phone Bhoot, Badhaai Ho and Crash Course. 88. Let's Talk Consent. 89. Queeristan -- Episode 190 of The Seen and the Unseen (w Parmesh Shahani).. 90. Gray (Sakshi Gurnani) and Tasalli Se (Tarun Dudeja). 91. Dear Teenage Me.-- A podcast by Yuvaa on Spotify. 92. Humankind: A Hopeful History -- Rutger Bregman. 93. The Stanford Prison Experiment. 94. Invisible Women — Caroline Criado Perez. 95. Will -- Will Smith's autobiography. 96. Homeland Elegies -- Ayad Akhtar. 97. Yearbook -- Seth Rogan. 98. Shamoon Ismail on YouTube and Spotify. 99. Vampire Weekend on YouTube and Spotify. 100. Dev D by Amit Trivedi. 101. Hum Hai Rahi Pyar Ke -- Song from Nau Do Gyarah, starring Dev Anand. 102. The Before Trilogy by Richard Linklater. 103. Rambling Man -- An interview of Richard Linklater by Nikhil Taneja. 104. Superchor -- Song from Oye Lucky Lucky Oye. 104. Succession, Ted Lasso and Bojack Horseman. 105. Someone Who Will Love You in All Your Damaged Glory -- Raphael Bob-Waksberg. 106. The Lord of the Rings -- JRR Tolkein. 107. The Lord of the Rings -- The films. 108. The Lord of the Rings: The Rings of Power. 109. 8 Book Recommendations by Nikhil Taneja on Chalchitra Talks. 110. Weekly Movie Recommendations by Nikhil Taneja on Chalchitra Talks. 111. 80 Marvelous Recommendations by Nikhil Taneja on Chalchitra Talks. 112. Nikhil Taneja's 2020 and 2021 recommendations on Instagram. 113. Nikhil Taneja's 2022 favourites, specially compiled for The Seen and the Unseen. Check out Amit’s online course, The Art of Clear Writing. And subscribe to The India Uncut Newsletter. It’s free! Episode art: ‘I'm not lonely' by Simahina.
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