The Chaser and the Runner: The Pattern that Destroys a Relationship
Jillian on Love
00:00
The Balance Between Togetherness and Distance
When we are in these patterns where the distance is far overriding the togetherness and as a result, you feel disconnected. What's happening is that both people are completely dysregulated. They're unregulated. The antidote, simple but not easy, is to come together so that you can co-regulate, so you can regulate together. It would mean that you would have to take some leadership in your relationship and sit down with your partner. Don't force them to sit down and say, when are you available? Great. If you're going to sit down, I'd love to talk to you. That's a terrible way to start a conversation. We need to talk or my therapist said
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