When we react to something, we need to ask the question, what is going on inside of me that I react in this way? That's an emotional process question. Another example Smith gives is, why can't they be nicer when they come home? So that's the content of this situation. They're coming home, they're in a bad mood and process oriented questions would ask. How do I manage myself when my partner comes through the door? How am I taking responsibility for myself? The more anxious I get, the worse things are going to get.