And so it's like, what a

poor, like, like very inadequate method for determining whether or not something abusive has taken place. Like i call dibbs on the survivor position, like that's basically what it is. It's like in most cases, with maybe a few exceptions, whoever calls like, i was abused first is the one who gets to claim the ideological space of survivor and is then believed, right? A, but if both people saying, i was abused, or one person is saying, i was abusid, the other person is shaing, i'm actively being abused right now, ye, why is it that we believe one and not the other, right? Which really does? I mean, it falls apart as soon as you say this stuff, like it dosn't make any sennse, right? And people will then say, well, you know, it's actually very common for abusers to say that they were abused in order to a, to escape accountability. That's what they'll say. If i say, while, you know, this person is saying tat they are being abuse, well, tha's a very common thing for abusers to say, i really guess exactly. Gess exactly. And that equally cann apply to the person who is making the original accusations. So if that's ecaus agree. I think that it is common for people who are behaving abusively to feel that they are being victimized and to frame it that way. So we actually need more information about the specific acts that are being carried out, or that we're carried in order to determine, like, whether or not something is abusive. Ye,

sobust. There's a space of moral justification within the nextis that it'slike, it's like a race to get there, you know? Because once you get there, you are able to use that to justify your subsequent actions, yes, even though they are objectively very disturbing, often, i know, because you get to claim the space of like, centr the survivor am. You know, you can, you can like, make demands of other people without, without the danger of anyone's reflect calling you on it. You know, aad. I mean, related to this is that your, your, your cancil campaignn can be m construed as a form of justice and as a form of activism, right? And activism within the nexodus has, you know, a high prestige value, right? And if you can frame your basically normative conflict that you're blowing out of proportion as a form of activism, is a form of political work, then you, you know, you have access to a certain amount of cachet from that. And, i mean, it's very disturbing to to

say, but, like, we have literally witnessed iv been one in particulars coming to mind. But it's not the only one that i've seen a translation campaigns in which people are actively and publicly abusing a person, like, actively and publicly degrading, humiliating, threatening a person, encouraging that person to kill themselves. And while doing this, they are framing themselves as doing activism, doing emotional labor, and are literally asking for people to venmo them money, am to pay them for their community vice of, like, ritualistically and publicly om destroying this person's life, you know. So it's pretty fucked up, like, it's pertty fucked up. And, you know, if anyone points that out, like the way that cancelcls our works, it's like there's this built in coercion rat because if anybody points any of this out and is like, actually, this is disturbing. Or like, you know, actually, we have not heard this other person of the story. Actually, this person is also saying that they were abused, so why can't we actually hear what they had to say? Or, you know, the severity of what his happening to this person is concerning to me. Or, i think this person does deserve to still have some friends. Like, if you say any of that, it's very easy for you to be called an abuse apologist or somebody who supports abusers. And then canselation campaigns can happen against you. So many people, even if, like they should hof intuitively sense that someo stuff is wrong, or am scary, or like, maybe they, they know the person who is being accused in there, like, this description of this person is really does not match my am experience of that person. So i don't, i don't believe this, like, they really can't say anything without the potential are, like, huge, huge consequences for themselves, for sure.