The Importance of Secure Functioning

In a fair and free union among adults, where it's a symmetrical relationship, the relationship has to be based on principles of fairness, justice, and mutual sensitivity. We forget that relationship is an abstraction. It's something we make up in our heads. And if you don't shape this thing, called your relationship like you would a block of clay and shape it to your desires today, not when you were children, not your family of origin, but your culture that you're creating. If you don't do that in any world involving human primates, that's, that's trouble, right? We're operating something that's only half built.