Understanding the Mum Effect: Silence vs. Honesty in Communication

Tasha Eurich: Insight Tasha Eurich is an organizational psychologist, researcher, and New York Times best-selling author. Thinkers50 has named her one of the top 30 emerging management thinkers in the world and a top 50 world leader in coaching. She was selected by Marshall Goldsmith for his exclusive “100 Coaches” project to advance the practice of leadership. Tasha’s TEDx talks have been viewed more than three million times. She is the author of the book Insight: The Surprising Truth About How Others See Us, How We See Ourselves, and Why the Answers Matter More Than We Think. In this conversation, Tasha and I discuss the critical nature of self-awareness and the tendency most people have to stay mum about the truth. She shows us how to discover loving critics who will help you get better — and what you can do and say to support useful feedback coming your way. Key Points Internal and external self-awareness are both critical — and different. Improving both is important for most leaders. “Research shows that people are perfectly willing to tell white lies when they’re easier than the cold, hard truth.” Loving critics are people who have mutual trust with you, have sufficient exposure to the behavior you want feedback on and a clear picture of what success looks like, and are willing and able to be brutally honest with you. It’s critical to be specific in the questions you ask, seeking feedback. Prime the pump by zeroing in on only one or two areas at a time. Bonus Audio What Others See Resources Mentioned 5-minute Insight Quiz Insight: The Surprising Truth About How Others See Us, How We See Ourselves, and Why the Answers Matter More Than We Think* by Tasha Eurich Book Notes Download my highlights from Insight in PDF format (free membership required). Related Episodes How to Get Way Better at Accepting Feedback, with Sheila Heen (episode 143) Five Steps to Hold People Accountable, with Jonathan Raymond(episode 306) How to Process Your 360 Degree Feedback, with Tom Henschel (episode 341) What to Do With Your Feelings, with Lori Gottlieb (episode 438) Discover More Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic.