Shame is the biggest impediment to happiness in life something that many of us picked up very early in our lives. It's passed along so easily and so often by parents on the back of cutting remarks, unnecessary judgments and thoughtless choices. Do not let the shame you are working to overcome hitch a ride with the lessons you teach your kids. Let them be comfortable in their own skin,. pretending to be dragons, flailing to music you don't like, trying things you yourself would never try. There is no shame in that.