Embracing Identity Beyond Competition

Change is a constant. Changes big and small are always happening in our lives, while the world also changes around us. We can either resist these changes as unmooring threats to our sense of self, or embrace them as chances to get better and stronger.

The key to taking that second approach, my guest says, is developing rugged flexibility. His name is Brad Stulberg, and he's the author of Master of Change: How to Excel When Everything Is Changing – Including You. Today on the show, Brad unpacks why allostasis is a better model for dealing with disruption than homeostasis, and how healthy change moves in a cycle of order, disorder, and reorder. We then discuss ways to move through this cycle with rugged flexibility — an approach to life that keeps some things solid and stable, while letting others change and flow. We talk about the importance of adopting a being versus having orientation, managing your expectations, diversifying your identity, and more.

Resources Related to the Podcast

• Brad's previous appearance on the AoM podcast: #491: Everything You Know About Passion is Wrong
• "The Case for a Tragic Optimism" by Viktor Frankl
• New Dad Survival Guide: The Mindset
• AoM Podcast #527: Male Spirituality and the Journey to the Second Half of Life With Richard Rohr
• AoM Article: How Labeling Your Emotions Can Help You Take Control
• AoM Podcast #690: The Life Philosophy of Bruce Lee
• Sunday Firesides: Build Your Life Upon Multiple Pillars of Support
• Sunday Firesides: Feelings Follow Action

Connect With Brad Stulberg

• Brad's website
• Brad on IG