i recognized that i didn't know how to express anger unless it was reactive and volcanic and otherwise. What i've doing recently, as i've been feeling more, is like, put in a fucki un apologetic poem, march around your house and fukin. Embody it. Bring it back. It gives you energy when you don't let it make you small. And it's not so sticky. When you really allow yourself to go there, to channel it in a way that's healthy,. Like, this s e that you brought up, it doesn't stick. It's like, it just likei it just begins to flow through your body," she says.
One of my best podcasts of all time, this emotional conversation that’s been 16 years in the making, is with my wife Vylana Marcus and former fiance / best friend Caitlyn Howe. We sit down with a bottle of whiskey and let it all out. We each take turns sharing our darkest hours and deepest shadows, with a lot of tears and a lot of laughs. We discuss my devastating 6 days in a darkness retreat, my ongoing relationship with self-love, the impetus of my name change from Chris to Aubrey Marcus, and the erotic aspect of harming oneself, to name a few themes. But perhaps most powerfully, Vylana and Caitlyn share their own shocking and emotional challenges in their relationship to the masculine.