5min chapter

The Best of "How To" cover image

How to Talk to People: What do we owe our friends?

The Best of "How To"

CHAPTER

The Problem With Asking for Help From Friends

The more we assume people like us the more intimacy that we have with them. To me, setting a boundary is a communal act. I'm going to fulfill my needs no matter what your needs are which looks like, hey, if you call me really upset at 10 p.m., I don't need to make time for you because at this time in my life I'm very, very busy. But when your friend receives that boundary, they're feeling like so so so alone and I reallyreally need someone's help. And there's just this disconnect between our two emotional worlds in reality.

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