This chapter explores the complexities of sincere apologies, focusing on the emotional barriers that hinder individuals from expressing regret. It emphasizes the importance of understanding forgiveness and the nuances of delivering a meaningful apology amidst defensiveness.
Dr. Harriet Lerner’s work has transformed my work and my life. She’s a renowned psychologist and bestselling author who has been studying apologies — and why some people won’t give them — for more than two decades. In Part 2 of our two-part series, we share from a course together on her groundbreaking book Why Won’t You Apologize?: Healing Big Betrayals and Everyday Hurts. We dig into the “mischief of defensiveness,” the power of listening, and the secret life of the non-apologizer. We also take on one helluva role play where you get to hear me get schooled and learn a lot and get schooled again.
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