The grieving process involves acceptance. When you accept, what it helps you do is sit in the present and then actually look forward to the future in a positive way. Whereas helplessness is all about making an assumption about the future that makes you not act to day. And this is what's really confusing about acceptances. A lot of people think, ok, if i accept that i failed out of college, does tht doesn't mean that i don't do anything? No, actually, the opposite.