Sally Kohn: I'd love to end our conversation with a piece of research that you talk about in your book. And it's about how we tend to have the wrong idea about what people value in us as friends. She says understanding this can actually be quite empowering. Being friends is about being loving toward other people, she says.
It's a mistake to prioritize romantic and familial relationships over friendship, argues psychologist Dr. Marisa Franco. Strong, supportive friendships expand our sense of self, she says, and are associated with greater well-being and health. Marisa offers research-based strategies to make new friends and deepen our existing friendships, including helpful concepts like mutuality and the mere-exposure effect. Marisa and Maya also discuss how to stay friends through big life changes, why fighting could make your friendship stronger, and how to break up with a friend with clarity and kindness.
For more on Marisa's work, check out her book, “Platonic: How the Science of Attachment Can Help You Make—and Keep—Friends."
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