The Importance of Learning to Lose the Grip

Author Elise Loehnen has thought a lot about women and desire. In her new book On Our Best Behavior: The Seven Deadly Sins and the Price Women Pay to Be Good, she breaks down the cultural forces that teach women to be desirable rather than desiring, and the shame attached to a woman wanting something: whether it’s sex, success, or a damn slice of pizza. Whether it’s lust, and the way we encourage women to police others' sexuality, or sloth, and the way women are encouraged to be their husbands' caregivers, these invisible expectations serve none of us. Instead, Elise talks about ways we can liberate ourselves in ways that improve our sex lives and beyond: how to balance masculine and feminine energies in relationships, how to shed sexual shame, and so much more. As Elise says, “Our bodies are portals; lust is the invitation to enter.”

Please note that this episode includes discussions of sexual trauma. If you would like to skip these portions of the episode, please skip through: 

• 19:35-25:13
• 41:36-43:03

Show Notes:

• 4 Penis Problems and 4 Ways to Solve Them
• What’s a Sexual State of the Union & Why Should You Have One?
• MEET ME ON TOUR! Sex With Emily Book Tour: SMART SEX Event Dates
• PRE-ORDER MY NEW BOOK! Smart Sex: How to Boost Your Sex IQ and Own Your Pleasure
• SMART SEX PRIZE PACK (submit your pre-order proof of purchase at the bottom of the page, be entered to win the prize pack and everyone that enters receives a copy of my new and improved Yes! No! Maybe? Guide)
• Yarlap Kegel Exercise Kit & System (code EMILY for $35 off)
• On Our Best Behavior: The Seven Deadly Sins and the Price Women Pay to Be Good: Amazon | Barnes & Noble | Bookshop 
• More Elise Loehnen: Podcast | Newsletter | Instagram | Website | TikTok

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