A to Z Quick Tok 43 | Would you rather have a friend who is a great listener or a friend who always gives excellent advice?
The A to Z English Podcast
Friendship Preferences: Listener or Problem Solver?
A discussion about the different preferences in friendships, with one speaker favoring problem-solving friends and another valuing good listeners. They compare themselves to being from different planets and emphasize the importance of having someone who will listen to their feelings and emotions.
In this episode of The A to Z English Podcast, Jack is joined by May, Layla, and Hendrick as they discuss the following Would you rather? question:
Would you rather have a friend who is a great listener or a friend who always gives excellent advice?
Transcript:
00:00:01
Jack
Welcome to the A-Z English podcast, where Jack and Social take you on a journey from learning the basics to mastering the nuances of the English language. Our podcast is designed for non-native speakers who are looking to improve their English skills in a fun and interactive way. Each episode covers a wide range of.
00:00:22
Jack
Topics from grammar and vocabulary to slang and culture to help you navigate the English speaking world with ease.
00:00:31
Jack
Welcome to the.
00:00:32
Jack
A-Z English podcast My name is Jack and I'm one of the hosts of the podcast and I'm here with three of my good friends. May Leila and Hendrick. They are helping me out today.
00:00:44
Jack
And sitting in for social and we're going to do something a little bit different today, guys, this today I'm going to hand the controls over to May and she is going to surprise me, Layla and Hendrick with a would you rather question. So this is I have no idea what it is. I don't know what it is.
00:01:07
Jack
It's a total surprise, so as you.
00:01:10
Jack
Listen, I'm. I'm. I'm.
00:01:11
Jack
Learning just as you guys hear it, along with me. So may you have control. What do you got for us?
00:01:19
May
Alright. Thank you, Jed. Uh, today I have.
00:01:22
May
With your other questions for everyone, and the question is.
00:01:28
May
Would you rather have a?
00:01:31
May
Friend who is a great listener.
00:01:34
May
Or would you like to have a friend who always provide excellent advice?
00:01:42
May
So what do you guys?
00:01:45
Jack
OK. So let me just make sure I've got this. Uh, would you rather have a friend who's a great listener or a friend who always gives excellent advice?
00:01:56
May
Yes, Jack, you're right.
00:01:58
Jack
OK, but you can't have both. You can't have both.
00:02:03
May
Unfortunately not. That can only choose one.
00:02:07
Jack
So so my friend gives great advice, but he never listens to me or he listens to me really well, but he gives me terrible advice.
00:02:17
May
Or maybe he doesn't advise you as.
00:02:18
Jack
Or he doesn't give me any advice.
00:02:20
Jack
He's like, what do you think you should do?
00:02:22
May
Or maybe he'll.
00:02:23
May
Say you do whatever you like.
00:02:25
Jack
Yeah, yeah.
00:02:27
May
So which is the best for you, Jeff?
00:02:29
Jack
All right, I'm going.
00:02:30
Jack
To go last, I'm going to let.
00:02:32
Jack
I'm going to I'm.
00:02:32
Jack
Going to go backwards here. I'm going to let.
00:02:34
Jack
Hendrick go first, Hendrick. What do you think?
00:02:34
May
1st is.
00:02:38
Hendrick
Well, to be honest, it's quite tough, but I have discussed this kind of topic like 2 days ago with my friend because you know my friend told me that he doesn't have like the close friend that can share his story with story because and you know.
00:02:57
Hendrick
Sometimes it's not easy when you.
00:02:59
Hendrick
Have a you know.
00:03:00
Hendrick
Like a lot of problems and.
00:03:02
Hendrick
Then you have to.
00:03:02
Hendrick
Worry them in yourself because it's going to.
00:03:04
Hendrick
Be like a.
00:03:05
May
Poison for you. So I think for really.
00:03:11
Hendrick
It's more better to have like a friend or you know, he or she is a good listener for me. Yeah, because sometimes when for me, like when I have a lot of problems, I just need like a friend that I can so I can share my story together. I don't maybe I don't need that.
00:03:31
Hendrick
Price, but I just need, you know, like the the the person to listen to me at least. Like I believe that, you know like.
00:03:41
Hendrick
Like they're they're still, there is still a person that cares about me. Yeah. So I just need, like, a good listener.
00:03:51
May
So you just need a friend to listen to you most of the time. That's sweet.
00:03:54
Hendrick
Exactly, at least. At least it.
00:03:58
Hendrick
Can reduce my stress.
00:04:00
Hendrick
Yes. Or, you know, like for me from.
00:04:02
Hendrick
Like depression or something like that.
00:04:04
May
Yeah, OK, but this is.
00:04:08
Layla
Yeah. For me, honestly, as you know, guys usually I don't know, but I feel like usually women like to talk to someone more than others, give her advice and.
00:04:25
Layla
Some so maybe.
00:04:31
Layla
That resolve or they try to fix your problem. So usually I want to talk and others listen to me, especially when I in when I'm in very hard. The situation, as Hendrick mentioned, I need to.
00:04:51
Layla
Will deal or maybe release my stress. My sadness. I know it's not good, just.
00:04:59
Layla
To talk and others other listen to you. You need some advice on good advice, but in this case I I have to ship this. I have to choose only one thing, so I will go with the to have a good, a good or maybe great listener.
00:05:20
May
So most of the time you will be like.
00:05:23
May
Hey, you just listen to me. Don't say anything.
00:05:30
Layla
Yeah, so like this.
00:05:34
May
I think Jeff will have a different answer from us. What do you think, Jeff?
00:05:39
Jack
Well, I think Leila's right. I mean, I think that like if you ever read the book, men are from Mars, women are from Venus, Men want solutions.
00:05:49
Jack
And women want people to listen to them. Hendrick. I don't. I'm not sure I understand your answer, but because you chose to listen. But I'm joking. I'm joking.
00:06:03
Jack
I think you write like Layla's right? Like just having someone listen to you is is like therapy. You know, just someone to like, actually and hear you and and let you kind of vent your feelings and everything but.
00:06:20
Jack
I don't really care about that. So what I want is I want like really good advice so that I can use it to make my podcast better or make some money or something. So even though my friend never listens to me, every once in a while he'll drop a little diamond piece of advice.
00:06:41
Jack
Like little gold, you know little gold bricks that I can pick up and I can use them. And so in that case, I'm gonna go with a friend. Who?
00:06:52
Jack
Maybe doesn't listen to me very well, but drops some really good advice every once in a while that I can use to make my life better. And I'll let my audience members be my listeners. So I'll just do the podcast and everybody can listen to me. But my friend can give me advice.
00:07:13
Jack
So I'm gonna go against Hendrick.
00:07:16
Jack
And Layla's answer for this one.
00:07:19
Layla
OK.
00:07:20
May
When you just drop a head.
00:07:22
May
Then will pop up with. The solution. Is that what you're trying to say? Ohh OK.
00:07:25
Jack
Exactly. If I'm some kind of difficult problem and be like, hey man, what am I gonna do? He's like, you do AB and C and everything will be fine. I'm like, great, I'll do it and.
00:07:35
May
So that.
00:07:38
May
That is interesting to.
00:07:39
May
Know yeah, you love solution more than everything, yeah.
00:07:41
Jack
Yes, that's right. Cause I venture from Mars, I'm from Mars, so we like solutions, yeah.
00:07:49
May
OK.
00:07:49
Hendrick
Yeah. So I think Leilani, we are from Phoenix, yeah.
00:07:54
Jack
You're from Venus? Yeah, I'm from Mars. I'm. You guys are from Venus. Wait, what about?
00:07:59
Jack
Are you from Mars?
00:08:00
May
I think I will be on the east side. So for me I need people.
00:08:10
May
To listen to me.
00:08:11
May
Most of the time.
00:08:13
May
Like you understand, the feeling that that is.
00:08:17
May
Be too tough or too hard and no one would like to listen to us. OK, the feeling is so stressful and we just.
00:08:30
May
Wanted to cry when nobody wants to spend time with you. Listen to whatever you want to say and for me, I most of the time I don't need any solution. I just need to express my feeling. How sad I am. And maybe and.
00:08:50
May
Someone cheated me. I just wanted them.
00:08:52
May
To know how.
00:08:53
May
I feel so. Who doesn't know? Just sit down and listen.
00:08:56
May
Me and trust me, the person who.
00:09:01
May
We meet the person who's a great listener while they are listening without we realizing.
00:09:09
May
They were also.
00:09:11
May
Some solution like instant solution like that, so we don't need a a person who just tell us what to do from A-Z enough a great listener from so that's my idea.
00:09:25
Hendrick
All right, all right.
00:09:29
Jack
Hendrick, why don't you jump in?
00:09:30
Jack
What do you think?
00:09:32
Hendrick
Yeah, I.
00:09:32
Hendrick
Mean like?
00:09:33
Hendrick
For me, if I have if I have.
00:09:35
Hendrick
Like a a problem. And then if I have to choose like a friend and then if if it becomes like a friend that he or she is not a good listener.
00:09:44
Hendrick
I think I.
00:09:45
Hendrick
I don't want to share my story with.
00:09:47
Hendrick
Those kind of people, because I mean like sometimes.
00:09:51
Hendrick
You know like.
00:09:52
Hendrick
People, when they have a lot of.
00:09:54
Hendrick
Problems, they just.
00:09:54
Hendrick
Need a listener.
00:09:55
Hendrick
To to listen to.
00:09:57
Hendrick
Their story. So that's why. And I also believe like a lot of people like did the phrase and then they just killed themselves because no one listened to them. No one listened to them.
00:10:05
May
Yeah, you're right.
00:10:07
May
Because nobody wants to listen completely, they they are repeating the same thing.
00:10:12
May
Again and again.
00:10:13
May
But that is what they think.
00:10:16
Hendrick
Yeah, and also.
00:10:16
May
If you guys could you guys?
00:10:17
Jack
Repeat that one more time. I wasn't listen.
00:10:20
Hendrick
Ohh really so.
00:10:24
Jack
I'm just kidding. Yeah.
00:10:25
May
Please tell me the solution the solution project.
00:10:28
Hendrick
Yeah. So.
00:10:32
Hendrick
Yeah, I mean like as I said before like, you know, like a lot of people like when they depress and then they decided to kill themselves because because they don't have like a friend or like people that listen to their.
00:10:44
Hendrick
Sorry. Yeah. So they just need like, people that listen to their story. That's it and.
00:10:50
Hendrick
You know it's not.
00:10:50
Hendrick
Good. Yeah. And I I think like it's not good when you you have like a store a problem and then you want to start with a friend and then your friend is like he or she is not a good listener and then you know like.
00:11:03
May
Like running away, you know, sometimes.
00:11:04
Hendrick
Yeah, and yeah, and when you want to, for example, like when you want, you tell your story and then see or see like try, try to tell about their stories also does not.
00:11:16
May
Yeah, it shows.
00:11:16
Hendrick
Really good. Yeah.
00:11:19
Hendrick
Those those not. Uh yeah, they, they.
00:11:20
May
Selfish, right? Right.
00:11:22
Hendrick
Are not like good listeners.
00:11:24
Hendrick
Yeah, even even when they even they have.
00:11:26
Hendrick
Like good advice, I think that's.
00:11:28
May
Not that's not good.
00:11:30
May
Yeah, they should listen because I feel they should listen. Visit first.
00:11:34
May
And then then they can make up their home.
00:11:37
May
Whether they should say anything.
00:11:41
Jack
Yeah, be quiet fast. To fast to listen and slow to speak. Right. Isn't that the expression? Quick to listen. Slow to speak. Yeah. You guys changed my mind. I my you know, you're so emotionally healthy the three.
00:11:50
Hendrick
Yes. Yeah.
00:11:59
Jack
Of you are so emotionally.
00:12:01
Jack
Healthy. And then there's me with my black heart. You know, my little tiny black heart? Barely.
00:12:07
Hendrick
You are very good person day.
00:12:09
May
Actually you can speak with your mind.
00:12:12
May
I don't see anything wrong in the.
00:12:14
May
Because of course people need solution as well so.
00:12:18
Layla
I think I think.
00:12:19
Jack
It's right though. I mean, I think I think you're right. Like a real true friend is somebody that actually listens to you and hears you and. And that's the kind of relationship that a healthy relationship that people need and want and look for when they're choosing their friends. So I you guys are definitely right. I I I'm outvoted.
00:12:39
Jack
3:00 to 1:00 and I think you guys made the right decision and listeners out there.
00:12:44
Jack
There, whose rights are three emotionally healthy uh guest hosts, or this screwed Uncle Scrooge. Jack with the tiny black heart barely beating in his chest. Let us know in the comments section of our website A-Z englishpodcast.com, or send us an e-mail A-Z English.
00:13:06
Jack
Podcast@gmail.com and let us know what you think. We are really curious and for those of you looking.
00:13:12
Jack
Or a wonderful place to practice and learn English. Hit that WhatsApp link down there and join our WhatsApp group. I promise you it is an amuse. It is Disney World for ESL students and it's a wonderful place and you can try it out for free. You get free zoom lessons for two weeks.
00:13:32
Jack
You can have experience 15 different groups where you know you can talk about 15 different topics. There's an A-Z English podcast group in there where you can talk about episodes of the.
00:13:44
Jack
Podcast and we would love to see you in there. So with that said, thank you.
00:13:49
Jack
Guys for joining me today.
00:13:51
Jack
I really, really appreciate it.
00:13:53
Jack
And yeah, we'll see you next.
00:13:53
Hendrick
Bye. Bye. Bye bye bye bye.
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