Self Handicapping in Relationships

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Relationship subatach is a pattern of attitudes or behavior that are destructive and used to either impede success withdraw effort or, most importantly, justify failure in relationships. The term hadn't been in the literature before when you were interviewing psychologists who specialize in relationship therapy. So when you said, i'm lucking to talk about self savotage when it comes to love, was that something that everyone was like, oh, i see this all the time? Absolutely sir.

Does it ever feel like you—or someone you know—is always entering a relationship that’s doomed? According to psychology researcher, Dr. Raquel Peel, you may be falling victim to a surprising foe—yourself. Raquel studies “romantic self-sabotage,” the patterns and behaviors that can keep a person from having successful relationships, or justify their failures. In this episode, she outlines common destructive habits to watch out for, and gives guidance on how to recover if you spiral into sabotage. Raquel is a Psychology and Counselling Lecturer at the University of Southern Queensland. Her research interests include relationships, suicide, bullying, stigma, medical education and research methodology. Originally from Brazil, Raquel currently lives in Brisbane, Australia, with her husband Matthew, their two cats Tigre and Patera, Miniature Pinscher, Lobinha, and Doberman, Urso. To learn more about "How to Be a Better Human," host Chris Duffy, or find footnotes and additional resources, please visit: go.ted.com/betterhuman