You know, i was scared too about the back scene when i first heard about it. I didn't express those fears because i was kind of worried that they would make you more or something like that. The thing i do a lot to in the conversation that i think people often have a hard time thinking about is like doing paraphrase. That's a really helpful way to assist your own thinking, and also to let the other son know that they've been heard. It becomes the conversation of two people who who love each other, who are in a hard situation created by disagreement, but who are working together to solve that problem. And we start to, instead of becoming like this, escalate