Dreams, Fears, and Parenthood | 16min snip from Mind Pump: Raw Fitness Truth

Speaker 3
i still go back because you know that uh we were up in um we were up in tahoe for the new year for 2020 and i was on a run and i was riding my snowboard and i hit my head the hardest I've ever hit it oh I remember that back and I'm pretty sure all this reality
Speaker 1
changed that was the black swan event for me what would you do right now if you just woke up and you're in a hospital bed we're looking at Justin's back oh my god I had the
Speaker 3
worst dream yes yes. It was horrible, dude. That was all crazy. Yes. Yes. I actually would prefer that. Oh, fuck. Finally, it's starting. Everybody like has logic and reason.
Speaker 2
Hey, you know, speaking of waking up from a dream or crazy. So, you know, the story that you have shared multiple times on this. Uh, in fact, I've reshared it cause I like it so much is the, um, twilight zone story. Yeah. Did you know that's an old parable? It's been around forever. Wait, which Twilight Zone? Oh, it's got to be, right? And it goes a little bit different. So the robber. Oh, he dies? Yes. And then he thinks he's in heaven and gets everything he wants? So I'm listening to a book right now. It's J.D. Rockefeller's 38 Letters to His Son. Really good, by the way. Maybe that'll be the shout- out today if we don't have one already. And one of the letters he's writing to his son is that parable, but it's told a little bit, but almost identical. It's basically like this guy shows up to this place and it's supposed to be paradise. And he has all these things that he can women and gambling and food and just all the stuff that he can indulge in. And he's like, oh, wow, okay. And then he's like doing it for a little while. And then he gets bored one day and he goes like, is there any work I can do here? And they're like, no, sir, there's no work for you to be done. He's like, this is awful. Take me back to hell or whatever. And he made that comment. He's like, you are. What makes you think you're not there you know yeah wow yeah so i was like oh my god that's so crazy i mean that was a long one of my favorite episodes
Speaker 1
that i just showed a friend of mine was the one where there's a whole there's a neighborhood where everything stops working all electronics stop working all the cars stop working everything stops working lights stop working they can't watch tv no news radio no nothing so the neighbors all come out they all start talking with each other next thing you know they're all starting to freak out uh we're under attack what's going on then they blame one of the neighbors he's acting kind of crazy or whatever they attack him turns this whole thing and then it zooms out at the end of the episode basically the neighborhood goes into like they're fighting each other yeah and people have guns protect their homes and just turn on each other then it zooms out and there's aliens looking above this this town like okay it looks like it takes approximately seven days for the humans to to turn on each other let's turn back on their power something like that so it's an experiment to see how long it would take us to turn on each other that's really cool bro that for people don't know the twides don't by the way i think you watch now the whole series like all of them i'm
Speaker 2
gonna have to watch it because I had no idea. They're so
Speaker 1
good, bro.
Speaker 2
So many of them are so good. I was going to say, that's so old. They're so good. There's so many of them. There's another one where they're like. I had no idea. I had no idea they were that deep. When I was a kid,
Speaker 1
I was obsessed with the twide zone. And they would scare me so much that if somebody played the song, I would get scared. So my family would play the song and scare the shit out of me. That's
Speaker 3
how Ghostbusters was for me. The song scared you? Ghostbusters? Yeah, it was little. I mean, it was like. Wait, weren't we like 10? No, it was like nine.
Speaker 1
Much different. My bad. Much different. How old
Speaker 3
were we when the first Ghostbusters dropped? Maybe we're
Speaker 1
younger than 10.
Speaker 3
It was the very first one. It's pretty old. It was the dogs that broke out of their statue. I remember that. That was the scary part. My brother.
Speaker 4
1984.
Speaker 3
Oh. So we were five or something. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, it was five
Speaker 2
or something. Oh, sorry, Jeff, bro. Yeah, he's four. Pussy. Yeah. Five years old, dude. I remember that, too. You know the other one? What was the one with the flying dog? That one that never- Never any story? Yeah, yeah. Is that scary? Yeah, there was something there that was scary, too. Really? Yeah, again, I'm the same. That one traumatized every kid because of the horse dying, right? Oh,
Speaker 1
what was the horse's name? Atrax? Atrax? What was his name?
Speaker 3
Yeah. Oh.
Speaker 1
Artemis? No. Artec? Artec. Artec? Yes. Damn. Remember he's like holding onto the horse? No. The
Speaker 3
horse freaking. I barely remember that one. Atreyu was the guy that had him. Was it Atreyu? Atreyu was his.
Speaker 2
You know what theme song got me was, because again, I was also really young. The first time I said it was Poltergeist. Well, that was scary, though. Yeah, that was really scary. No, bro. Very scary.
Speaker 1
Nothing was like Hellraiser. Do you guys remember that? That was way
Speaker 2
too scary for me to
Speaker 3
pay attention to that. That was in the mouth of madness. Any psychological horror is the worst possible. That was a horrible one. So is Twilight Zone
Speaker 1
supposed to be scary at all? It's black and white. Yes, but it's supposed to be creepy, eerie. Mind-bending. Mind-bending. Like, okay, so there was one episode. Like, I liked
Speaker 2
it. I love all the stories you've shared from it. There was one.
Speaker 1
Maybe, Doug, you can look up the picture of it. They're cool because
Speaker 3
they're kind of life lessons.
Speaker 1
No, no, no. I'm going to explain one episode that traumatized the shit out of me. Really? Yes, bro, because I used to watch it late at night. I watched this on tv i was always a thrill seeker with that kind of stuff when i was a kid so even though scared and watching that too and there was an episode with this woman i told you guys about this she got plastic surgery and her face is all wrapped up yeah and the doctors are talking and the nurses are talking to her she's like i can't wait till i'm beautiful you know kids get so scared when they look at me and she's like oh this poor woman i hope the surgery works and at the end they unwrap her the gauze and she's this beautiful woman and then the doctor turns around he's a fucking monster freak yeah and his face turned around and when i was a kid oh it's shocking bro i literally went
Speaker 5
i literally went ah and i started crying scared
Speaker 1
the creature that's the doctor right there when he turned around look at the doctor's face bro i was i get the chills thinking about it trauma it literally imprinted trauma into me as
Speaker 3
a kid. Oh, my God. What a great twist. Yes. They're all like that. The Eye of
Speaker 1
the Beholder. She's
Speaker 2
the only one that's pretty. Everybody
Speaker 1
else is. She's the beautiful one, and the doctor and the nurses are all these monsters. Yeah. And so that's the whole Eye of the Beholder. That's why the title of it is, you know, and then the one with the
Speaker 2
plane. So it seems like it's very much so Black Mirror-esque, right? I mean, Black Mirror probably got pulled from them. They're the originators. The
Speaker 5
twide zone was over. And then there was...
Speaker 1
What was the other one? There was a twide zone, and then there was one that's like... Trip Keeper? Tales of Trip? No, it was an old one, too, where they're like, we control the vertical. We control the horizontal. What was that, Doug? Come on, Doug. You gotta remember that. You know, I didn't grow up with a TV. Oh, that's right. That's right. I forgot. Before TV. That was before TV. We
Speaker 3
had puppet shows. I listened to the radio. Speaking of the radio, in Black Swan events, remember the War of the Worlds? Yes. When they aired that? Dude, people thought it was real. Straight pandemonium.
Speaker 1
It actually caused legit pandemonium because people thought it was a real newscast of so knowing
Speaker 3
that like i mean they obviously saw the response you know from back then i'm
Speaker 2
sure if i would have known twilight zone was storytelling like that with these great cool and that they did intelligent twist like that's really good oh
Speaker 1
you know what doug outer limits was the name of it it was outer Limits. So there was another episode where there was a guy. He's a super racist, like, piece of crap dude. He gets on a train. And the next thing you know, he's on a train to Auschwitz. And it, like, takes him back in time. And he's, yeah, dude. I'm telling you, this plot zone's amazing. That's great. It was brilliant TV making at its finest. They don't tell stories. Yeah, I don't think
Speaker 2
I've ever had anybody who was into it enough to explain it to me. Because also, I probably would have went back and watched it because I think those are all great. It's got cool little lessons to it. It's really good. I
Speaker 1
want to watch it. My son's way too young. I don't want to traumatize him. I'm way too young. Not
Speaker 2
like us.
Speaker 3
I watched like Faces of Death when I was like nine. Oh my God. Did you really? Yeah. When you were nine? Yeah, because older brothers, you know what I mean? Like I would go over to my friend's house to the older brother, have on, we're curious.
Speaker 2
So I, yeah, but I wonder what's better or worse, right? So then you have me who was like completely sheltered from any of that stuff so that I'm scared to death as an adult to watch half that shit. That's why you're such a scared guy. Yeah, we didn't watch, I didn't watch any of that as a kid. None None of that stuff. You were not desensitized. I've watched everything. Because I grew
Speaker 4
up with no TV. I wasn't sensitized to it as well. Are you scared of stuff? You like scary movies? I don't like them. No, I don't like them. I
Speaker 2
never watch them. Yeah, see, that's why I don't watch them. See, I watch scary movies. I never watched them. And then even as an adult, when I was in high school and in college and kids wanted me to watch with them because they just thought it was funny to see me not want to watch it. It's just like, just like friends would do. I'll watch.
Speaker 3
Don't walk around the house saying, I'm going to take a shower. Oh, dude. Every scary movie. Like you always get murdered. Yeah. No, I
Speaker 1
I'll watch something terrifying and Jessica will watch me watching it. And then she gets scared because I make no reaction. She goes, it's like, you don't have emotions. My face stays the same. But now I realize it's that when I was a kid,
Speaker 3
I
Speaker 1
used to watch shit like that because I used to like the thrill. I used to watch a lot. Which, by the way, makes sense. For people with ADHD, we seek out sensory. So it makes sense that I would seek out this scary-ass shit as a kid because I could feel because otherwise I can't feel. I love movies
Speaker 2
too. I'm such a movie person, but I never like.
Speaker 1
Speaking of fear, I was listening to John Deloney podcast. I want to bring this up. His show was so good, right? Some of the callers are just. Anyway, one caller calls in. It was this young dad and I could totally relate. So this young dad calls in. He goes, I used to be real anxious and I kind of got it under control. I have a little baby daughter. She's about six months old. And he goes, and he goes, how do you go to sleep when they sleep? Because I feel like I'm afraid she's not going to wake up. And then he goes, he goes, nobody tells you that when infants breathe sometimes, it sounds like they're choking. You guys
Speaker 2
remember that the first time? Oh, they're choking. Sometimes it seems driving yeah holding their breath hospital i mean how many times as a dad have you done this like i've i know for sure i can i count you wake him up or yeah i'll go in and i'm like laying on his bed like to right right where we see if i can feel the air or feel like that because he's just so quiet
Speaker 1
you know you're like he's breathing right yeah by the time you get to the fourth kid like me like baby cries like she's probably all right yeah she'll be all right let's see if she'll still cry she'll be all right no it's scary and you mentioned driving home from the hospital yeah especially that first kid driving with the first one yeah oh bro see everyone well
Speaker 2
we didn't so we did the tradition in katrina's family is you get picked up by a limo that's like a traditional thing that are family everybody in the family puts together on it and you get picked up from the hospital with a limo oh that's a
Speaker 1
cool idea yeah it's cool it's like hold the baby in the back yeah
Speaker 2
it's dangerous yeah just stop in a limo you're driving like 20 miles an hour like yeah it's like a tradition that they've always actually nice yeah the whole family gets together they pitch in they get a they get a limo you know today it's not that expensive to get a limo to do anything right so you get a limo to pick them up pick us up so yeah i
Speaker 1
remember when my oldest had um his first like fever we were sitting on the couch together and he had a fever and he was all quiet little rosy cheeks as he was sick and i'm looking at him and then you know you guys get those intrusive thoughts especially when you first become a parent like what if they die what if they don't know it started happening to me and i just
Speaker 3
start crying i'm like
Speaker 1
oh my god if i lose my kid this is terrible oh
Speaker 3
it really messes with you well yeah yeah anyway yeah i would still like traumatized and scarred what did john say to the guy yeah
Speaker 2
i mean he's basically telling them that you're it's normal yeah john's so good about that it's one of the things i mean it must be like uh psychology 101 when you're dealing with someone like that is like the i almost there's like a pattern to when he's dealing with someone yeah one of the first things is he lets them know like which by the way i remember this is a strategy abnormal half for having these as a as a trainer you do those clients right that were addicted to food or were really overweight it's like letting them know that listen a lot of my clients or almost all my clients struggle with the same thing it's like one of those things that you should say to your client afterwards. And it kind of like calms them down right away or they don't feel like something's wrong with them or
Speaker 1
they're broken. Well, you can hear when he's talking to the person. First off, one of the values of his show that I found is if you identify it all with the person asking the question, he talks to the person and you get value because you're like, oh, that's how it works for me. And I get that. And he's so, obviously he's an expert at what he does, but it is very normal to get tremendous. You become hypervigilant when you have a child, especially moms. Do you know that you talk to moms, you ask them, do you ever sleep well anymore? Nope. After I had kids, I stopped sleeping well, even if the kids sleep. Yeah. Because their bodies are so wired for to make sure that the baby's okay what's going on and then dads i can sleep no problem unless there's a sound that resembles danger or someone coming in the house and then it's very
Speaker 3
weird or lack of sound or when there should be sound something like there's some kind of danger yeah it's usually that's there's always an eerie sense like yeah that that was one of those that actually paid off for us that there was something wrong so yeah oh
Speaker 1
when your boy when
Speaker 3
yeah when he was choking oh that's scary yeah so you know it's it's good to have that kind of intuition but again like learning how to live life without sense of overwhelming fear and anxiety, like you can't, you can't, um, exist and, and, and pursue, um, you know, beyond that until you reconcile with that. And it's like, it's so much harder as a, you know, a new parent and like you're the unknown and like, and you've realized how resilient your kid is. like but it really takes a lot of reps you know it's it's so many reps that you gotta take and like especially have a traumatic experience like i had to go through all that like uh no he's still gonna be all right he can still get bumps and scrapes and and climb really high trees and like and he's gonna be just fine you know but like there is always an element of danger and that's that's part of our existence. It's life.
Speaker 2
Not to mention society perpetuates this also, right? Like we, uh, one of the most powerful ways to market to somebody is through fear. And so like, look what, look at the market is delivered to us. Now you have these little sock monitors you can put on the baby. That's tracking their heartbeat by the minute and alerts you if it goes north of this much or that much has these little things for temperature if the temperature goes down this much or that much it alerts you you've got now a camera not just an
Speaker 3
audio erotic about yeah
Speaker 2
every little thing and so you know and it's a very everyone's like oh my god yeah this is great this helped but it's all all derived from fear you know i'm fear fearful of all these
Speaker 1
things make a monitor for diapers to tell you if the baby pooped or anything like that because because like with little babies sometimes i'll cry a little bit and they'll start it's
Speaker 3
all stinky yeah
Speaker 1
yeah you know like they'll start shifting in bed and if they poop their diaper you better go you better off changing it otherwise you're gonna have to deal with it throughout the night or whatever sometimes it's not a poopy diaper and you want to let them and they'll work it out but sometimes you don't know like you go up and I walk up to my daughter's day and I'll smell around her. I'm like, I don't know. I don't know. I don't know if she pooped or I'll tell my wife, come check. And then she'll come over. It's your old finger test, dude. No.
Speaker 2
Slide it inside the diaper. Yeah. Then she wakes up. But she wears feet pajamas. How am I going to get in there to
Speaker 1
check to see if there's any poop?
Speaker 2
You know, we, I'm trying to remember, uh, I have to ask Katrina this question because, uh, we didn't have a lot of middle of the night diaper changing, right? Like that wasn't a common, a common thing. And I wonder if it was just because of diet and everything like that. Like, cause like, is it more common when it's
Speaker 1
not common? It's not common for us either, but when it happens, I want to change. Sometimes my daughter's happened once where my daughter, she kind of was stirring and then she went back to sleep and then she was stirring went back to sleep and then I'm like okay I think she's okay and then in the morning she woke up she had a dirty diaper and it get diaper rash poor baby you know what I mean so I wish there was like a freaking
Speaker 2
sensor and her poop doesn't always smell I've had friends before that are like they're trying to like let their baby cry it out a little bit thinking that they're trying to help them to like soothe themselves and then they find out like, oh God, she had a wet diaper.

2344: How to Lift Weights to Improve Your Golf Game, Tips to Avoid Injury When Getting Back Into a Sport, Ways to Overcome Nerve Pain & More (Listener Live Coaching)

Mind Pump: Raw Fitness Truth

Remember Everything You Learn from Podcasts