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You want what others want
The core idea explored in the book is memetic desire, which is the notion that we want what other people want. It is the belief that our desires are genuinely our own that is the great romantic lie. Memetic desire arises from the influence and impact of others on our desires at a subconscious level. Despite not being aware of it, we are drawn towards the things that others are drawn to, thereby converging on common desires.