The Importance of Following Imaginary Rules

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Full show notes at www.LearningLeader.com

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Dr. Julie Gurner is a doctor of psychology and is a nationally recognized executive performance coach for individual and corporate clients primarily in finance and technology. Trusted by top percentile talent and their teams to help them achieve world-class performance in fast-paced, high-pressure, extremely competitive environments. She's been compared to Wendy Rhoades of "Billions" in The Wall Street Journal (2019), and named a "Game Changer" by IBM.

Notes:

• High Standards: Holding a high bar is uncomfortable because it is "exclusionary," and most people want to make everyone around them happy & comfortable. If you hold a standard, it can't include everything... Figuring out your line & holding to it, will mean some tough conversations.
• "I think that there are two ways of looking at things that have happened to you. You can be a victim or you can be a survivor. Those are two very different cognitive positions."
• Balance: "People will tell you in books that you have to live a "balanced life," but if we are completely honest, almost all great things are born from periods of imbalance."
• Staying Small: A concept I believe, is that most people stay small, or don't go for what they truly want...because they believe that "imaginary rules" are true
• Be a Learner: The worst professionals, are the ones that stop learning the moment they graduate from school. And they are the majority. Being autodidactic - a self-learner - who also takes initiative, will have you in the top 10% of anything you take on.
• Goals: If your goals are "realistic," you are operating in a box. Check yourself. "If you want to be a game changer, you can't blend in."
• Know Yourself: When people are unable to commit to anything, it's because they don't know who they are. Shiny objects professionally (or personally) reflect a lack of certainty.
• When you get a genuine shot in the arm from what you do...of course, it's going to be hard to stop doing it. You're on fire. So many people are living their lives with the volume turned down. They don't get it. You don't have to live that way. Crank that energy up.
• "The people who rise aren't always the most talented or capable, but they are fueled by self-belief. Once you understand that, much of the business world makes sense."
• The difference between persistence and tenacious… persistent people stick to the plan to get to the goal. Tenacious people may change their plans altogether.
• A trait in the people who go on to do great things? Paul Graham defines it as being "relentlessly resourceful." I see it all the time. Here's a practical zero-to-one process to be relentlessly resourceful, if you want to set yourself up for some big swings.
• Julie goes on a daily walk around her farm. She uses that walk to reflect, think, and be outside. It helps her synthesize information.
• What makes a great executive coach?
  • A sweet spot between talking and listening... A great executive coach gives their clients space to talk. They listen. They ask great follow-up questions. They help unlock people. They help them become multipliers.
• How to deal with imposter syndrome?
  • "You probably have the ability, but you're not understanding your own story." It's important to keep taking chances. To keep meeting the moment. Julie helps her clients tap in to and write their own stories.