"I may not appear close to losing, but inside, I feel like the biggest loser. People used to admire how well I handle defeat, but I'm actually just a good actor. Once the cameras are off, I can't help but feel frustrated and hit my head against the wall. It's even worse now, as I realize I should have known better. Losing angers me more than ever before. Magnus rates my sanity as 10, and he's right. Sanity is showing the world you're sane even when you're not, and I think I go beyond that. Overall, top chess players like me may not be as happy as you'd think."

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