All In The Mind cover image

What we get wrong about attachment styles

All In The Mind

Understanding Avoidant Attachment and Its Implications

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Avoidant attachment is characterized by a child's lack of engagement during reunion with their caregiver, often appearing indifferent or dismissive. This behavior arises from a history of rejection in caregiving, where the child learns that their expressions of distress are met with dismissal, leading to internalized feelings of unworthiness and isolation. The caregiver may communicate a message of rejection through neglect or shaming, making the child feel unsupported during times of need. Consequently, the child learns to suppress their feelings and rely solely on themselves for comfort and validation. This pattern establishes a foundation for adult relationships, suggesting that the impact of attachment styles can extend beyond childhood, challenging the notion that they are fixed throughout life. While early studies indicated a direct correlation between childhood and adult attachment styles, new research highlights greater complexity, indicating these styles may not be strictly categorical but rather fluid and subject to change.

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