Exploring altered states of consciousness and spiritual growth

The individual describes a profound experience of being between reality and infinity, feeling disoriented and questioning existence while in a heightened state of consciousness. They recount feeling like their spirit left their body, hinting at a pre-psychotic state, which gradually improved over time. The individual notes the positive transformation post-experience, mentioning an enhanced ability to love, be funnier, and feel lighter on stage. They detail engaging in MDMA sessions with a spiritual focus, leading to a perceived god connection, and a belief in updating their mental 'operating system.' However, they recognize the challenging aspects of encountering these spiritual realms, noting difficulty in comprehension and communication, despite ultimately considering the benefits outweighing the challenges on their spiritual journey.